hairyformed

Signs of My Times

2010-05-09T23:09:00.000-07:00

As either a marker of achievement or lameness, this is my 100th blog post. I have too much crap to say I guess.

Many of us have things in our lives that make us feel old. For some, it's baldness, male or female unfortunately. For others, watching our kids' birthdays come way too quickly. For most of us, looking back on how much things cost (gas at $0.99/gallon around 1998-99, $0.29 and $0.39 cheeseburgers and hamburgers at McDonald's, etc.), what were the cool cartoons growing up (Disney afternoon, Thundercats, Transformers, G.I. Joe, Voltron, etc.), and what were the cool fashions that are popping up again as "retro" (pegged pants, neon glasses, etc.) remind us of simpler, easier times. For me its gray hairs.

Keep in mind, that there are some of my friends who can remember, oh about 16 years ago, when I entered Woodcreek High School as a freshman, the days in math class where I would allow any and all members of the opposite sex to pick through my #6 length hair to find and pull out the single digit gray hairs I had then. So this is nothing new. My head of hair that is. I've been dealing with the ever saddening view point from my barber chair of seeing a higher ratio of white vs. black drop to the salon floor with relative exponential progression for more than a decade and a half. Today was a new low.

As those creepy and scary two numbers, 3 and 0, march ever onward toward my life, it is with much weeping and gnashing of my teeth that I admit the following: I have (now had) a gray chest hair.

I'm not a hair-less guy. As my wife remembered and shared this evening, I once had a friend in college "nair" my back hair into a cross. Somehow, I, along with my brother, captured this hair growing gene from what appears to be thin air, and have been developing it with relative ease since we hit double digit ages and it has consumed my body.

Another flashback to high school. My senior year during volleyball season, I used to dye my hair the color of whatever school our next game would be played at in order to advertise to our tiny fan base where we were playing without saying a word. In order to do so, with my jet black mane, I needed to bleach it everytime first in order to allow some of the lighter colors to show up. Hair does not and has never scared me. Until today.

Today marks the day I admit to the world and finally, more importantly since lying to yourself is foolish, to myself that I am o-l-d. There are some guys at my work, in their late 40's, full head of hair and not a gray hair anywhere to be found. Could be dye, but knowing how cheap cops can be, its probably legit. Sure they might have wrinkles or other signs of aging, but to me, no signs of their actual length on this earth are visible to the human eye. Me however, I can now no longer strut care free shirtless at a pool or the beach with the knowledge that my rug of a chest is monochromatic, but that it is now and forever will be (since I won't be dying my chest hair in this life) polychromatic. Sigh......

My Life as a Dad Vol. 1 No. 3 Discipline of a Parent

2010-05-08T22:34:00.000-07:00

I don't like to discipline. I understand it is an inevitable part of proper parenting and without it our kids would run amuck, but I still don't like to do it. Not for the full reason that most of you may be thinking. I definitely don't like causing my own child pain, but I also don't like to do it because I don't ever feel like I am fully doing it correctly. Let me explain. Discipline, Godly discipline, is used to correct, teach, and encourage. If done correctly, the child will A) still feel loved, B) know of their sinful heart, C) be prayed for, D) and continue to learn about their need for a Savior who can heal them through His own sacrifice and love. Here's my problem. While I try to explain all of that, I always feel like I tainted it by my own pridefulness. My telltale sign for knowing Nick needs to be disciplined, is because a frustration, anger, or combination of the two, has welled up inside of my own prideful and sinful heart. Sometimes it's to the point where I don't even feel as if it would be right to discipline him when I'm in sin myself and need my own rebuking. So, in those failing moments, I let it go and let him continue. I will still persevere most of the time, following through with my God ordained responsibility, and I try to remember to ask my 20 month old for his forgiveness as he's crying and hugging me, but in all honesty, it doesn't happen a majority of the time. I'm sure I am not alone in this problem as mankind, particulary the men of mankind, have a major ego problem and don't like to be questioned or disobeyed. I know somewhere in God's infinite wisdom are Scriptures that point in the right direction for my own heart and its cleansing. I'm also sure in Ted Tripp's Shepherding a Child's Heart there is profound knowledge just waiting for me to revisit it. But in the meantime, while I'm being lazy and just thinking about all this, it sucks to need discipline while needing to discipline.

My Life as a Dad Vol. 1 No. 2 Time is on My Side

2010-05-07T08:34:00.000-07:00

I have one son. Either due to my inability to multi-task or his sheer amount of energy, I've conceded to the latter, I am unable to get anything done unless he is distracted. All to easily I have relied on my friends, Dora and Diego. I know television is bad for your kids. Fries their brains and all that jazz. Teaches them they don't have to use their imagination, the writers of cartoons will do it for them. However, selfishly, how can I get anything done? I'll tell you how. Give him a sipee cup of juice, some cheez-its, and turn on one of the 10 DVR'd episodes of Dora or Diego and plop him in my recliner to enable 20 minutes of uninterrupted time. This may be extended to an hour if my other orange buddy Nemo and his race car friends Lightning and Mater are in the neighborhood.

Does this make me a horrible father? Probably. But just like life, it's about balance. Should I put him in front of the TV all day? Absolutely not. Does an hour at a time kill him? Not right now it doesn't.

Maybe the problem is compounded by our recent move into a new home and the endless things that need to get done. Painting. Flooring. Landscaping. Hanging. Rearranging. On and on and on. I'd like to say that once things settle down and we get settled in the TV time will be cut into tiny bits and removed slowly from his life. Probably not the case, but a man can dream of the day his only kid is content playing with Lego's for hours and hours with no adult supervision required.

It is probably coming across as I don't like to spend time with my son. I assure you that is not the case. I love playing with him, reading to him, showing him how to fix things, how things work, sneaking candy to him, pushing him on the swings, and the endless supply of life that I'll get to show and teach him. But sometimes, I need to put a desk together, upload pictures, fix the lawnmower. And yeah, these are MY needs and MY needs are supposed to come second to HIS needs. Most of the time. In a perfect world. And it is my desire for this to be my reality. But as is my life, my world slowly creeps up into everyone else's. Sad but true.

And, as a side note, is it ok if he's watching "Christian" TV like Veggie Tales or if the show has good "morals" closely resembling Christianity? I think about these things as I drive around at work. Let's take Ni Hao Kai Lan for example. Super sweet cute Chinese girl teaching the Chinese language and what it is to be a good friend. In the process however, her friends are constantly displaying poor behavior and what not to do. Not something I want Nick learning or thinking is remotely okay just because his friend Tolby did it on Nick Jr. the other day.

I guess when you break it all down, the best way for me to teach my son and myself is to go back to the Scriptures, showing him how to emulate Christ. Not Moono, Boots, Larry the Cucumber, or his earthly father. Using the example of a God who subjected Himself to an earthly body, suffered and died so that His Father would have all the glory and we would have joy eternal in an endless life and worship of Him.

But man that's hard to remember when I need to rewire my surround sound system...

My Life as a Dad Vol. 1 No. 1 Supporting Other Dads

2010-05-01T20:44:00.001-07:00

Primero de Mayo. A reason to celebrate Cinco de Mayo early and eat Mexican food and desert with good friends. That's what I thought anyway. See, we gathered tonight at our church and had dinner, played with our kids outside on the playground, inside the gym with a ball, and smacked a pinata. Little did I know the night would end in such catastrophe. Here's how it played out: All kids under 5 weren't able to get more than 3 pieces of candy out of the pinata, so the youngest of the adults, who will remain nameless, busted it open. The cornucopia of candy that spilled out was quite impressive and any little kid with even a basic knowledge of what candy means went after it, Nick included. Being that it was almost time to go and he had gone WAY too long without a diaper change, we allowed Nick to suck on a piece of a lifesaver while we changed him. Oh, and don't call CPS or judge us with the next piece of the story. Since we are such stellar parents, he gagged on the lifesaver while he was laying down being changed, and we continued to let him suck on it. Unbeknown to us, those multiple gags were just priming the charge. Once the cleaning was complete and the pajamas were zipped, I picked up the claymore to leave our fiesta. Just as I lifted him off of the chair he had been laying on, and my shirt spread wide at the collar, my wonderful son proceed to spew what can only be described as a major hazmat incident entirely down my shirt.

Let me pause and explain a critical piece of information. I have had old breast milk aroma spit up projected onto my face, neck, and down my shirt before. I've cleaned up all manner of food items from restaurant floors and patios. I've stood in the same water at the same time that baby poop has resided in. I've even been peed on my bare stomach by a little boy's geyser. I have not, however, ever, ever, ever had adult smelling vomit spewn down my shirt, onto my neck, and permeate my nostrils in the way that I did tonight. I've seen and dealt with plenty of drunks while I'm at work with all kinds of bodily fluids on them, but I glove up. I've seen a few major fatalities with major organs where they shouldn't be, doesn't bother my stomach a bit. But puke on me? Nope, nope, nope. Back to the events of the evening.

It was at this point, as I held Nick at arm's length and pleaded with my wife, as I had abandoned all relation to my firstborn, for her to take "her son" and she was unable to physically hold anything over five pounds as her body was convulsing from laughter, that I saw what true support of a fellow father looked like. My good, no, there's an upgrade in status necessary here, great friend Kevin reached out and took my chunk covered son from me as my eyes were welling up from the stench. Not only did Kevin remove my poor son who was scared and almost crying from the breakdown of his father's mental capacities, he went one step further. I had attempted to remove some of the vomit from the inside of my shirt by pulling it away from my body and in doing so felt, as I am again now do through the retelling of this nightmare, pieces of Nick's regurgitation falling slowly down my neck, chest, and stomach. I then pushed my shirt back against my body to stop the flow and unintentionally pressed said pieces deeper into my chest hair. At some point, unknown to me as time seemed to stand still, Kevin had passed off Nick to Katy and gotten some paper towels. Throwing caution to the wind, Kevin, this highly trained and veteran father of two more months than I, jumped to my aid and attempted to wipe off some of the vomit from around my neck so I would stop flailing about like a fish out of water. It is with the utmost sincerity that I offer my apologies to him for probably yelling at him that his efforts were causing me to feel the spew bits roll around on my collarbone area and yell "I feel it running through my chest hair!" and rip away from his assistance. For this, I am so, so, sorry Kev.

Unable to stop my own bile from building in the back of my throat, I tried distracting myself by doing what I felt was necessary, help clean up what had fallen through my shirt and onto the floor. Big mistake. Bile increase at an exponential rate. While Katy was distracted by trying to find one of our iPhone's to capture this moment in history, I took someone's advice and left the building to remove the source of most of my soon to come night terrors, my shirt, and not do so in as public a place as a church hall. I ran to our truck, removed my shirt, threw it on the rear floorboard, cranked up the air, and rolled down all the windows. I quickly realized the stench was still way too close and grabbed the shirt to throw it as far back in the bed of the truck as was possible. Embarrassed, still smelling the mustard gas on my chest and neck, and a little nipply, I sat in my truck as my scared son and grinning wife came to join me. I did offer apologies to all the ladies as they exited the building and saw me attempting to cover myself and my half-nude body as they walked by. Great night to pick the closest parking spot I might add. Before closing this story, I must say, don't hold any ill will toward Katy for the pleasure she took in the situation or anyone else who laughed and enjoyed it. I'm sure it was quite a site to behold to see a 240 pound CHP officer gagging, dry heaving, and whining from a little throw up. Again, it was not baby spit up, it was full on adult smelling vomit.

Oh yeah, and I decided to break up my few and far between blogs into categories I can more easily follow. This way I can keep this going in a series for as long as I can [;p[to monitor my own progress or regression. In this case, regression.

Potty Mouth

2010-03-22T23:41:00.000-07:00

This past Friday, Katy, Nick, and I went to Disneyland. About halfway through the day, while at California Adventure and during Nick's nap, I needed to see a man about a horse. Whilst extracting the necessary liquid poison from my urinary tract, I overheard the following conversation behind me between, what I can only hope, was a 5 or 6 year old son and his father:

Son: Dad, I really have to go poop.
Father: (While flushing) I know kiddo, but all the toilets have poop on them. (Flushes again)
Son: Why dad? (Dad still flushing)
Father: I don't know, some people are just lazy I guess (Flushes yet again)
Son: Well why can't we just use the pee potty?
Father: You want to poop in the pee potty? (Another flush)
Son: Yeah, there's nobody there anyway.
Father: That's not a good idea kiddo. Here, this one's all ready.
(A brief moment passes as the son de-pantses)
Son: DAAAHHHAADD!
Father: What?
Son: I can't go while you're looking at me!

It was at this point that I couldn't bite my lip any longer to keep from laughing and had to leave. Plus, that would've been real weird if I had just stood in the bathroom to listen to a conversation, even one so lively as that.

Once I returned to my own son and wife, I found him wide awake and with a full diaper. Since I hadn't changed one in about a month, I volunteered to take care of it. Little did I know what was about to happen. You see, the changing table in this particular California Adventure bathroom was all the way in the back of the room, about three stalls down from where the above conversation took place. As I walk around the corner toward the baby station, I saw the same father standing outside of the same stall. Apparently the kid was not done yet. Here's how the rest of the talk went:

Father: Are you done yet?
Son: NO DAD!!!
Father: Can't you pinch it off?
Son: No because nothing has come out yet!
Father: Do you need a magazine?
Son: NO DAD! Umm, yeah, I need a magazine.
Father: (Stifling a chuckle) Seriously?!
Son: (Not laughing and dead serious) Yes!

You never know what you're going to see and/or hear at the Magical Kingdom

What is That?

2009-10-11T00:50:00.000-07:00

Just before shutting the computer down for the night I saw a video clip on our desktop. Katy was already asleep so I was unable to ask her where she downloaded it from. Opening it up, I expected some comedic short clip. As the two minute movie went on, starting slowly but building in anticipation, I slowly felt myself slipping into my future. Sitting near Nick. Having him read some old blog post of mine out loud. It didn't help that the movie didn't take up the whole screen and a picture of him on our desktop stared back at me, or that I thought about how my beautiful caring wife brought me dinner at work and when I went outside to meet them, my boy was standing on her lap, saw me, and immediately smiled and reached for me. Time goes too fast. Stopping to think about it as its passing sometimes makes it slow down for those memories you hope you won't forget. Writing them down might help in the remembering. The loving of those in the memories is I think what matters most. Enjoy the video and think about your child[ren] and or parent[s].

Pluses and Minuses

2009-08-31T14:39:00.000-07:00

Last week I went back to work. I know, I know, wah, wah, wah right? A whole month off and everyone should feel real sorry for me. Well here's my personal dilemma. I love my family. I love my job. Quite the Catch-22 for all you Joseph Heller fans. I've realized now, more than ever, I love spending time with Katy and Nick. This past month has been fantastic, with all the travelling and lounging around the house. Nick started standing a took a few first steps. Just this last week he started to say, "Uh-oh" when he drops (but mostly throws) things on the ground. On top of that, he will now reach for us if we're standing over him, something I'm sure we won't like so much later but hey, we're enjoying it now. Once you're holding him or if he crawls over to where you're laying on the ground, he'll give your neck a tight squeeze, almost like a hug. Tear-jerking moments I tell ya. The time with my wife has been amazing. I've really come to appreciate how much she puts into our marriage and Nick's life. She seems to spend every waking moment with him, changing, feeding, cleaning, changing, feeding, cleaning, a vicious cycle. Plus, I can tell she's missed me. I got a week off in March but it seems like I've been hitting the ol' grindstone pretty hard leading up to August, so I could tell she needed me to have a vacation as much if not more than I needed one.

Here's the flip side of Heller's catch phrase. Work is awesome. Where else can you drive fast legally, arrest people which saves lives, see crazy things like dismantled jets on a big rig travelling down the freeway, have airplanes land in your "office" aka the freeway, and work 3 off 3 work 4 off 4 granting you 3 day weekends every weekend?!? About two weeks into my vacation I missed work. I was having a great time with family, but I also missed my job. I know, I know, Voltaire said we can't have the best of both worlds. But that doesn't negate the fact that it would be super sweet.

I could ramble on and on about loving my family and my job, but it comes down to this. A month off with my family enables me to grow and have this:

Going to work after a month off enables me to now have this:

You decide. And don't let how long Katy will allow me to keep said 'stache influence your decision.

Parables in Poo Vol. 1 No. 5

2009-08-22T11:49:00.001-07:00

As can be read about here, Katy, Nick, my folks, and I recently went to Disneyland. While staying in Anaheim we got rooms at the Hyatt, a pretty good hotel about 15 minutes from the Magic Kingdom. This hotel has an odd aura surrounding it. The last time I stayed in it, I was about 10 and my brother had an "incident" in the elevator after staying a few minutes too long at the hotel gift shop while mom and dad ate dinner. Nick had a similar "incident." Here's the story. I had just finished giving Nick a bath and was taking a shower while Katy got him ready for a day of fun at California Adventure. As is customary, Katy likes to let Nick "air dry," which, oh faithful readers, I trust you can figure out what that means. Once I finished my shower, I went to go find some clothes, only to find Nick still "air drying." He had quickly discovered that a hotel bathroom has not one, but two toilet paper holders as well as various sink piping, all extremely accessible to crawling babies so needless to say he always knew when the bathroom door was open allowing him entry to the world of undersinks. Which, in this instance, was where he headed. Not two minutes after he reentered the bathroom with Katy doing her makeup and me getting dressed, I hear this, "Awww, nooooo, Nick! Awwww....Rob can you come here for a sec?" Fearing the worst, I ask, "Is he okay?" To which Katy replies, "Well just c'mere." I hustle over to assist in what I fear is some electrical accident, and find this:

Not really knowing what to do, I instinctively run for the camera. The shots aren't great because while focusing I'm getting yelled at to put the camera away and help because Nick is playing in his own poo. But I did get one last shot:

Apparently, while trying to grab something off the sink and in complete stealth mode, Nick had opened the floodgates of his bowels with no sound whatsoever. It wasn't until Katy stepped in it and almost slipped that she realized what he had done. She quickly picked him up and put him in the tub, where he promptly attempted to clean his own feet by pulling the substance off with his hands and smearing it all over his chest, face, and the tub. After puting the camera away, Katy gave me a choice: the floor or the kid. I chose the kid. Once my hysetria subsided, since I had just showered and was not yet dressed, I hopped in the tub to clean my son. Mistake #1: I chose bath running instead of shower running. With the enormous amount of poo, it was apparently too much for the crappy hotel drainage system, slowly filling the tub with a thin layer of brown-water which began, unknowingly, to coat my leg hairs as I knelt in the tub to clean my son. Obviously, it took me longer to clean my son the second time than it did the first time. Once I realized I was covered in poo too, I quickly turned on the shower and held him up to the faucet. Mistake #2: I tried cleaning his backside first not knowing his chest and hands were still covered in poo, making my chest and hands now covered in poo too. After dry heaving a few times, I finally got him all cleaned and tried to pass him off to Katy. No dice. Not wanting to use a hotel towel and give new meaning to the idea of filthy hotel laundry, she used toilet paper. Not the most absorbant material that single-ply hotel toilet paper. For brevity's sake, let's just say that some of the bathroom grout in the Anaheim Hyatt room #1609 is a different shade than most of the grout.

Lesson learned. "Air drying" your child is ok so long as his piping has already been emptied...permanentaly.

Parables in Poo Vol. 1 No. 4

2009-07-19T01:03:00.001-07:00

I have no idea how, but I'm convinced, diapers are magic. Little kids after they start eating solid foods start pooping solid poo. You would think, in such a tight confined space, that poo would be squished everywhere and coming out the sides. Turns out, it only leaks onto the legs when it's in liquid form. Take our friends for examples. One evening, we're playing a friendly game of "Settlers of Cataan," a central coast favorite or so we learned upon becoming permanent residents, and the conversation naturally turned to bowel movements while building cities and roads, moving the robber, and bartering for wheat and ore. I describe a bm of Nick's and the recently discovered phenomenon and lo and behold, it's universally true! Our friends were so thrilled with my elation over said feces that they sent me a picture of one of their 1 year old son's they took in light of their newfound knowledge of my sick sense of humor and inquisitive nature.

Parables in Poo Vol. 1 No. 3

2009-07-19T00:54:00.000-07:00

This will be a snippet of a post that's about 3 hours long. Part of a three part post I wrote right after Nick was born. You can read the whole post here. For now, here's one of the better parts in my opinion and I never get tired of laughing at this picture!

...All in all, it was great being first time parents. Tiredness included. He did get a Billy Ribbon test which checks for jaundice, negative, and a genetic screening test which checks for all kinds of genetic stuff that we'll find out about later. Having a healthy baby boy is extremely precious and Katy and I felt truly blessed. One last thing. He pooped. It was awesome and gross at the same time, if at all possible. And me being me, I captured such an amazing incident on film. Here it is, check out the stickiness. I pulled the diaper apart so you could see the low viscosity levels found in what I now know as "marconium."

Parables in Poo Vol. 1 No. 2

2009-07-19T00:51:00.000-07:00

I figured the first few would be cheats since I'd already written a few about poo, so why not include them in these segments. Another oldie but goodie:

Walking and Dumping

A new segment

2009-07-19T00:27:00.000-07:00

I've decided to begin a new segment. After speaking with multiple new parents, and some experienced parents, old friends and new, I'm beginning to see a new trend. Everyone has a poo story and in most cases, dozens. Now that I'm a parent, I've increased my poo stories exponentially due to a non-potty trained additive in my life. So, I'm beginning a new segment here on hairyformed, I'm calling it Parables in Poo. The first one is a cheater as my wife posted it over on our blog, but since I'm known as a cheater in the gaming world and have basically cheated death in a sense because of the law of liberty in the Gospel, I figure it's right up my ally. So here it is, click the link and enjoy.

Parables in Poo Vol. 1 No. 1
What Smell?

Random Overdue Thoughts

2009-02-18T16:25:00.000-08:00

This blog is tough to keep up. I have a tough enough time now that I'm a dad writing in our family blog, but I justify that time because it's for family. This one however, is solely for me, so to write in it I feel like I'm taking time away from my family. But hey, Nick's sleeping, Katy's pooping, so I have a few seconds.

I have a slight work dilemma. I love working with my graveyard partner, Ruben. I also love that we are going to a 3/12 hr work week. What this will do is give me set days off. Obviously I'd like to have Sunday-Wednesday off since church stuff usually happens on Sundays, and Mondays would be nice too since fellowship stuff (bible study and volleyball) happen on Mondays. Ruben however, would like Tuesday-Friday off, rightfully so since he is a social butterfly and everyone (who's not married) goes out on these nights. This does create a conflict in my head and heart. If I don't compromise and take say Monday-Thursday, I'll lose a partner (my head), but my love is for Christ first, so obviously I'll take Sunday-Wednesday. Unfortunately for my work situation, this will probably partner me up with a slug or cause me to work days that are fairly boring. While this may not make a lot of sense to any non-Chippie's, like I said, they are random overdue thoughts.

Second thought. Being a parent is hard. There's so much I could say to this statement, but I will leave it as a question. Is it considered slight child abuse when your child is screaming at the top of his lungs as you are swaddling him in a blanket and you swaddle him even tighter because your eardrums are ringing like the bells at Notre Dame, and yet the tighter you make the blanket, the more he seems to like it? Thoughts.

Response to a response and the FOCA

2008-10-18T16:38:00.000-07:00

In response to my thoughts about the debate, a relative of mine, whom we'll call "J", responded with a lengthy, intellectual comment. This then is my response to her response, and is directed at her, but intended for all readers. I'll put her comment in its entirety and then respond to each point after:

robert -- i'm not trying to be antagonistic here, but in fact i'm very curious and would like to hear more about your stance on abortion. i also pose these questions to anyone who is reading your blog who can give me their 2 cents on pro-life views.

if i was raped, would you be opposed me to terminating a pregnancy that i absolutely could not bear the psychological trauma of carrying to term? (and honestly, i imagine if i were ever in such a situation i would probably be suicidal, which i assume you also believe to be a sin... but that would end both lives...)
if i was addicted to drugs or alcohol and was going to give birth to a baby with crippling and life-long physical, neurological, and emotional problems, would you be opposed to my decision to terminate the pregnancy in its early stages?

furthermore, if you are one of the individuals that says abortion should be available only in special and extraordinary circumstances (such as the above) but not to the population at large, where does my privacy about my sex life and my body begin and end? ...the same privacy that you enjoy as a man, which, i'll remind you, is not under threat by radical law makers and voters. do we not have equal rights as men and women, or, by virtue of my fertility, am i entitled to less privacy than you?

why does a state have a right to govern what i -- as a woman and a sexually responsible person -- do with my own body?

most importantly, how is it fair that a state should impose laws grounded in your religious beliefs upon me, when i don't believe the same things? do you not agree with the ideas of our forefathers that church should be separate from state?

when you say you worry that obama has "confidence in a woman's choice" you're implying that you (and those who share your beliefs) are somehow superior in intellect and reasoning than the population of women as a whole. is that really fair? does being a fundamentalist christian make you more fit to decide than an atheist or a jew or even a reformed christian?

you say we ought to protect the rights of unborn fetuses over those of gays (which is another discussion i would LOVE to have sometime in the future -- but that too means you think we ought to protect the rights of unborn fetuses over those of women, does it not?
just wondering though, why will it be a dark four years? roe v wade was passed in the 70s...

can it get any darker if abortion is already legal?

There really is no point in debating any of these questions if we disagree on the point at which a baby is deemed alive. Those who feel a life is not a life until the start of the 2nd trimester when an embryo becomes a fetus I'm am in obviously disagreement with. I'm sure anyone who has sat in a doctor's office and listened to and saw a heartbeat 6 weeks after conception would agree with me. How could I not have thought my son was alive when I saw him moving inside of Katy at week 8? The thing about being pro-life for me is that I was pro-life before being shown Nick on the ultrasound. I was pro-life not because I saw it with my own eyes, but because of the Bible and my full belief in it as being God-breathed. Nowhere in the Bible does it describe the unborn as anything but humans, people who are alive and have a soul. If you don't think a child is alive even by the second or third trimester, as partial birth supporters would, Google aborted babies and see how developed they really are when they come out during those trimesters, complete with hands, fingers, eyes, organs, etc. So, when do you believe life begins? If we don't see eye to eye on this, there's no way to debate your series of questions fairly, but I'll try.

(I'll put the question "J" asked in italics before my response.)

robert -- i'm not trying to be antagonistic here, but in fact i'm very curious and would like to hear more about your stance on abortion. i also pose these questions to anyone who is reading your blog who can give me their 2 cents on pro-life views. if i was raped, would you be opposed me to terminating a pregnancy that i absolutely could not bear the psychological trauma of carrying to term? (and honestly, i imagine if i were ever in such a situation i would probably be suicidal, which i assume you also believe to be a sin... but that would end both lives...)

First, God forbid you are ever raped, and I would be in vigilant prayer for you if you were, but I would absolutely be opposed to you terminating a pregnancy and obviously opposed to you committing suicide and here's why. How could you, after suffering such a malicious and atrocious act against your person, commit an equally if not more heinous act against an innocent child? A child that is literally a part of you? I don't believe you could if you understood that. In addition, how could you not being able to bear psychological trauma be an acceptable reason to commit the murder of an unborn child. Statistically, how many women actually get pregnant from being raped? To answer your second question, while I do believe suicide is a sin, I am not Catholic and don't believe it is just a sin in and of itself. I believe the selfishness that it would take to commit suicide, thinking solely of your own life and not how your action may impact others, is what I would consider sinful.

if i was addicted to drugs or alcohol and was going to give birth to a baby with crippling and life-long physical, neurological, and emotional problems, would you be opposed to my decision to terminate the pregnancy in its early stages?

Should parents who use drugs/alcohol during pregnancy whose babies are known before birth to have life-altering debilitating physical/mental/emotional/etc. defects be able to abort? Absolutely not. Talk to a family who was able to spend even a week with their baby, like our friends the Meyers' whose baby Megan was born premature and ask if they would take away even a day. Talk to a family who has a special needs child, and ask if they could go back to when they were still pregnant and abort their child, like our friends the Kostjuk's whose baby Reese was born with a diaphragmatic hernia and Emmanuel's disease. No family would take the life of their child if given a second opportunity to decide on aboriton, and no family should. How can we play God with lives, determining who should live and die, regardless of the life they might lead? Should we murder the elderly because their quality of life has decreased?

furthermore, if you are one of the individuals that says abortion should be available only in special and extraordinary circumstances (such as the above) but not to the population at large, where does my privacy about my sex life and my body begin and end? ...the same privacy that you enjoy as a man, which, i'll remind you, is not under threat by radical law makers and voters. do we not have equal rights as men and women, or, by virtue of my fertility, am i entitled to less privacy than you?

In regards to privacy about your sex life and body, you should be entitled to the same rights as a man, equal in all regards. However, if a man kills a woman, and the only evidence of the murder, due to the fact that she was cremated, was left on his body, are his rights to his body not forfeited? To me, this situation and abortion are the same, both murder. By virtue of your fertility, you aren't necessarily entitled to less privacy, but you are entitled to more love. No one can overcome the love a child has for its mother, or, at the very least, the connection the two have directly out of the womb. This isn't something that goes away with time, it possibly becomes buried deep down, but it doesn't go away. The father however, does not get this same connection with the child. Is that fair? No. But it's life and how God intended it and therefore necessary to accept. So are there things women get and not men? Are there things men get and not women? Of course. But the issue of abortion isn't about gender equality or the rights of a woman to privacy, health, her body, etc. It's about the right of the baby to live.

why does a state have a right to govern what i -- as a woman and a sexually responsible person -- do with my own body?

First of all, can you lump all pregnant women into the sexually responsible category? I don't think so, just like you can definitely not lump all of us men into that category. A state does not have the right to govern what you do with your body, but it does have the right to dictate what the consequences can be. Let me pose a question to you. Am I, as an officer and representative of the state laws of California, responsible to attempt to stop someone who is attempting to kill themselves? If I didn't try, I would be heavily punished especially if the reason I didn't try was because it's their body and they can do what they want to it. You may say, "Well that's suicide and they are going to harm themselves. You're protecting them from themselves." What about the person about to kill another person? Am I not supposed to attempt to stop them as well? "Well that's murder and they are going to harm another person. You're protecting the victim from the murderer." In both cases, I'm controlling what another does with their body. And this could be any person, man or woman, even a sexually responsible person. Yet, who protects the unborn? Who can hear them and help them? We, as humans, out of the womb, have the responsibility to protect them, humans in the womb, from being killed, even if it means governing someone else's body, woman or man.

most importantly, how is it fair that a state should impose laws grounded in your religious beliefs upon me, when i don't believe the same things? do you not agree with the ideas of our forefathers that church should be separate from state?

When did this ever become a question of religion? Not every pro-lifer is a Christian or even religious person so that's quite a blanket statement to make. Of course my views are persuaded by what I believe. But so are yours. What right do you have to impose your religious views on me? None. So is it fair for you to push your pro-choice agenda on me? Yet you do. We all do. It's inevitable. Even if someone is an atheist, their non-religious views still shape what they believe, vote for, fight for. To answer your second question, I very much do agree with the separation of church and state. Without it we could become a nation forced to practice atheism like Russia did. However, don't assume that your view of separation of church and state is exactly what our Christian forefathers believed and intended when they wrote about it.

when you say you worry that obama has "confidence in a woman's choice" you're implying that you (and those who share your beliefs) are somehow superior in intellect and reasoning than the population of women as a whole. is that really fair? does being a fundamentalist christian make you more fit to decide than an atheist or a jew or even a reformed christian?

I have a feeling you were beginning to get a bit emotionally tied to your "non-antagonistic" attempt at this point in the critique. Nonetheless, I will answer your questions on a woman's choice. You read this the wrong way and assumed I made an implication that I did not. In no way am I and those who agree with me more intelligent or reasonable than "the population of women as a whole." I would be the first to admit that. But do you not, in your disagreement, believe that you are more intelligent and reasonable than I am and those that believe as I do? You should, otherwise you would have a weak and watered down system of beliefs. I hope you do believe so strongly in something that you feel others are wrong in as to confront them and hopefully educate them in the process, as you are doing to me. With that said, pots can't call kettles black. It was not a lack of confidence in all decisions made by women, but as I already stated, I do strongly disagree with anyone who is pro-choice, therefore any person who gives advice to anyone else on the benefits of abortion over, say, adoption or keeping the child. And I'm not more fit to decide than any other religion, but I believe Jesus is and He wrote those opinions down for us. Also as a side note, I tend to think of myself as a fundamentalist reformed Christian, so I guess I fit in both of those categories.

you say we ought to protect the rights of unborn fetuses over those of gays (which is another discussion i would LOVE to have sometime in the future -- but that too means you think we ought to protect the rights of unborn fetuses over those of women, does it not?

I don't mind answering questions, but please read what I write instead of putting words in my mouth that I did not write. I did not say we ought to protect the rights of unborn fetuses over those of gays, I said we are willing to protect the right of "sexual orientation" but not the right of the life of an unborn child. That does not mean we protect the rights of the unborn over the rights of women, merely that we protect the right of life of the unborn over the right of choice of women. I hope you can show me a scientific study showing how many women's lives are actually in jeopardy while giving birth with modern medicine in a modern hospital. A quick survey of an OBGYN nurse I know, lead to a revelation that she has seen thousands of births and only one woman has died of complications. So we definitely aren't putting a women's right to life over a baby's right to life. But how many babies were killed because women "feared for their health?" This quote from Justin Taylor's blog helps to show how "health" is defined per Roe v. Wade:

Roe v. Wade was handed down on the same day as Doe v. Bolton, and Justice Blackmun said they were to be read together. Doe defines maternal health to include virtually any factor: "emotional, psychological, familial, and the woman's age." The effect is abortion on demand--abortion for any reason.

How can we protect a woman's "health" in this instance, when it is so broadly defined as to contain a woman's emotional state, over the life of a person? Oh, and I do hope we can discuss homosexuality in an open forum one day, it could be interesting.

just wondering though, why will it be a dark four years? roe v wade was passed in the 70s...can it get any darker if abortion is already legal?

Finally, how can life get any darker since it's been 30+ years since Roe v. Wade. Again, I refer you to Taylor's recent post on the Freedom of Choice Act. That, to me, is quite a bit scarier, darker, and sadder world that Obama promises to make his first act as president.

Thanks for reading this to its completion. Sorry for the length, but such a lengthy comment deserves a lengthy answer.

Debate

2008-10-15T21:44:00.001-07:00

I don't like where this election is heading for pro-lifers. The debate was this evening and I can't say McCain really swept it. He spent way too much time harping on the contrast between him and Obama and not enough on answering the questions, taking Obama's jabs lightheartedly, and focusing on the issues. While I think he did his best in addressing the economy, let's face it, if it's going to come down to an economy election, which it looks like it is, McCain is screwed. If it was all about Iraq, terrorism, and Afghanistan we'd have a fighting chance, but it's not. Not with the Dow Jones plummeting like it is. When the two candidates started to get into Roe v. Wade, Obama's rhetoric was extremely tricky and underhanded. I don't care how you slice it, any vote against partial birth abortion is a good vote, regardless if it doesn't address "health." The thing though that got me to write my opinions on this in the first place was Obama's confidence in a woman's choice. He related that it was a woman's choice on the abortion based on her family's, doctor's, and religious leader's opinions. That, to use McCain's catch phrase, my friends is a scary propostion and a scary world. Obama harped on the importance of the right to privacy per the constitution...what about the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness? How can we put that aside for the unborn, yet address it for sexual orientation? How can we concede and agree to disagree over the point of conception and yet heartily contend anything else when innocent lives are being taken away without any say or right. It will be a dark 4 years and we need to begin to pray for those unborn souls and their mother's decisions and counsel. God help us.

One Issue Vote

2008-10-14T22:24:00.000-07:00

I know its been awhile since I've posted here, but lately I've been thinking a lot about this, the fact that I'm basing my vote on who should be President of the United States on one issue alone, that of abortion. I'd been challenged by some unbelieving family members and colleagues about it and a twinge of doubt snuck in. Then I read this post from Vitamin Z. He posted these quotes from various learned men. Gave me quite a bit of reassurance, especially the one from Piper. Enjoy, and may your conscience be as clear as mine this November.

Theologian Dr. John Frame:

“…in some cultures (like the ancient Roman, in which the New Testament was written) there is not much that Christians can do, other than pray, to influence political structures and policies. But when they can influence them, they should. In modern democracies, all citizens are ‘lesser magistrates’ by virtue of the ballot box. Christians have an obligation to vote according to God’s standards. And, as they are gifted and called, they should influence others to vote in the same way.

This is not to say that political choices are always obvious. Often we must choose the lesser of two evils. Candidate Mershon may have a better view of one issue than Candidate Beates, while Beates has a better view on a different issue. It is an art to weigh the importance of different issues and to come to a godly conclusion. Each of us should have a large amount of tolerance for other Christians who come to conclusions that are different from ours. Rarely will one issue trump all others, though I must say that I will never vote for a candidate who advocates or facilitates the killing of unborn children.” [The Doctrine of the Christian Life (P&R 2008). p. 617.]

Preacher/author Dr. John Piper:

“…When we bought our dog at the Humane Society, I picked up a brochure on the laws of Minnesota concerning animals. Statute 343.2, subdivision 1 says, ‘No person shall . . . unjustifiably injure, maim, mutilate or kill any animal.’ Subdivision 7 says, ‘No person shall willfully instigate or in any way further any act of cruelty to any animal.’ The penalty: ‘A person who fails to comply with any provision of this section is guilty of a misdemeanor.’

Now this set me to pondering the rights of the unborn. An eight-week-old human fetus has a beating heart, an EKG, brain waves, thumb-sucking, pain sensitivity, finger-grasping, and genetic humanity, but under our present laws is not a human person with rights under the 14th Amendment, which says that ‘no state shall deprive any person of life . . . without due process of law.’ Well, I wondered, if the unborn do not qualify as persons, it seems that they could at least qualify as animals, say a dog, or at least a cat. Could we not at least charge abortion clinics with cruelty to animals under Statute 343.2, subdivision 7? Why is it legal to ’maim, mutilate and kill’ a pain-sensitive unborn human being but not an animal?

These reflections have confirmed my conviction never to vote for a person who endorses such an evil—even if he could balance the budget tomorrow and end all taxation.”

Princeton prof Dr. Robert George on 10/14/08:

“Barack Obama is the most extreme pro-abortion candidate ever to seek the office of President of the United States. He is the most extreme pro-abortion member of the United States Senate. Indeed, he is the most extreme pro-abortion legislator ever to serve in either house of the United States Congress…”

Perfect Timing

2008-09-11T18:41:00.001-07:00

I don't think I expunged enough on how perfect the timing was for Nick to be born. Let me lay it out how sovereign our God is, specifically in the Buellton Grindy's lives.

Point 1 - I had 6 days off in a row, starting on August 30th through September 4th, so I was home when she went into labor. A huge worry of Katy's was that I would be on the south end of my area, working on a fatality, that I couldn't get away from for 4 hours. Praise God for that.

Letter B - I had gotten the shaft at work when I was guaranteed to work morning shift in September and they violated our union's labor agreement to force me to work swings. So. To my dismay Katy and I had already set up all of her doctor appointments for September to coincide with my work schedule, planning on it being a morning one. Ergo, I would not be able to make any of the appointments since her doctor was extremely busy. Turns out I had the first few days in September off and Katy went into labor before I had to work any swing shift, and since I took a month off from the day Katy gave birth, I won't have to. Pretty stinking sweet.

Statement III - My dad was here when she started having contractions. He was able to help her time them while I got the bags (not quite ready yet) and the car ready to go. He also took care of shutting down the house and taking care of Lucy (our beagle), both of which I ignored due to my high blood pressure and stress levels at the time.

Punto Quatro - Katy and I both were super anxious to meet Nicholas and felt like as soon as the doctor said he would be able to induce if we wanted him too, that we would jump at the opportunity (not really, but we had to pray really hard about the, what we deemed, unethical decision). Obviously, as it turned out, we got to meet him 20 days early.

All in all, I would say our God is pretty magnificent, glorious, all-powerful, sovereign, preeminent, gracious, merciful, perfect, and all other awesome adjectives that could be ascribed to Him. Thank you for blessing your humble and unworthy servants oh Lord!

CHP Beach Day

2008-08-13T16:50:00.001-07:00

Every year our office has a beach day where we rent out a private beach on the north end of our Santa Barbara area and have a BBQ. Obviously with it being my first year at the office, Katy and I were able to go. Great day for the beach and just an awesome reminder of how blessed we are to not work and live in the concrete jungle that is LA!

Back at the Academy Once Again!

2008-07-16T22:13:00.000-07:00

Last week I had the opportunity to travel back to Sacramento to watch my old roommate, Jason Graham, who failed out in the 14th week of my class on the high speed course of the emergency vehicle operations course. It was definitely crazy to be there again, a little eerie driving through those gates, seeing the staff officers, etc. Here's a couple of pictures from the day, you can click here to see a slideshow of the day.

Jason not losing his bearing

The newly renovated fountain

Flashing the badge

Me and the graduate

Jason, his wife Tina, and his son Nathan

Getting Ready for Graves

2008-07-01T02:45:00.001-07:00

Tonight I have to stay up as late as I can to re-acclimate my body for the graveyard shift of 9:45pm to 6:15am. Here's how the night started after Katy went to bed (all times are approximate)

11:05pm - Katy asked me to find my bluetooth for her for tomorrow's big "handsfree" day.
11:07pm - I searched through both cars and finally found it under the Camry's driver's side seat getting a lot of use.
11:07:10pm - It was dead.
11:08pm - I found a Motorolla car charger, but didn't want to turn on the car for the dumb thing to charge.
11:45pm- I searched through the whole house to find our old Motorolla house chargers.
11:46pm - I realized in the search that I have about 4 boxes all containing a mixture of computer cables/old hardware, tv cables, old landline/cell phone cables and phones, misc. electrical cables
12:15am - I realized one of those boxes contained my old Nintendo 64.
12:16am - I recognized that I never play my old Xbox since Guitar Hero 3 came out for the Wii.
12:18am - I removed my Xbox and its games from the living room entertainment center and put it in with the box of TV cables.
1:00am - I reorganized those boxes condensing them down to two.
1:05am- While putting the boxes back in the closet I found a box containing all the Pez I ever collected (206 items with 12 of those being duplicates).
1:05:20am - I remembered that I wanted to sell all of them as a lot on eBay when we didn't have much money.
1:07am - I set up all the Pez on our dining room table.
1:10am - I used our new camera and tripod to take a picture of them all and then one picture of each quadrant since there were so many.
1:15am - I began searching online to see how much that many would go for and realized that I had some pretty old ones that were worth a bit of money, some $36.
1:30am - I realized I needed to research them all to get fair market share on eBay and ergo it would take too much time right now and be boring, concordantly placing the box of Pez back on the closet shelf where it will rest for another 6 years.
1:31am - I discovered I hadn't been charging said Bluetooth and began to charge and then sync it up with Katy's phone.
1:31:30am - I found out I didn't know how to sync said Bluetooth and researched it online.
1:45am - Nature called and I got distracted with loo reading.
2:15am - I uploaded the Pez shots to the computer and realized the phone was still not synced with said Bluetooth
2:20am - The phone got synced with said Bluetooth and Katy can now be a law abiding citizen.

Here are the shots I took of the collection. I know, I know. How old am I? 7? I stopped collecting right before Katy and I got married in January of '04, so I'm missing a lot from the collection, but she pointed out that my money could be put to better use serving the kingdom of God then collecting candy dispensers. I realized that even though it was a Sunday school answer, she was right...again.

A New Thankfulness for My Father

2008-06-25T18:01:00.000-07:00

The last couple of months I've walked in my dad's shoes. My gift to my son has been a crib. I know you guys are thinking, "Wow, I didn't know Rob did woodworking in his spare time! That's awesome!" While I appreciate the sentiment and being thought of as awesome, let me clarify. Katy's sister Michelle got this crib for her son Jacob when he was born.
Katy's parents saved it for us for the day we had a kid. So, Katy didn't like the original stain, sort of a natural pine, and asked if I could sand it down and re-stain it. Me being the man I am immediately said, "Of course baby!" Thinking this would be an awesome thing I could do for my boy. Well, after over 35 hours of work on it, I finished. I must say I wish I had taken some pictures at the different stages but didn't have that foresight. Nevertheless here it is in its finished state with a "dark walnut" stain. Note the lack of professionalism in the paint brush strokes instead of the stain blending purely with the wood as well as the clumps of stain on the rounded edges where I got either lazy, complacent, frustrated, or amateurish or a combination of any and all of the above. You may not see it, but trust me its there and it haunts my perfectionistic dreams. (Thanks for doing the bumpers, blanket, and bed skirt mom! They look awesome!)
Now here's the rub. We knew we wanted to get the baby's furniture done in an "espresso" stain. So when we were at Home Depot I decided to be economical. You see, I could have bought one quart of stain and one quart of polyurethane coating for a total of $25 or I could buy one quart of stain/polyurethane for $7 and save $18!Pretty good deal huh? Here's the problem. "Espresso" was not sold in this combo, only "Dark walnut" which it turns out is not very dark and should be called "light walnut," and "espresso" should be called "dark espresso" or "almost black, yet brown, espresso." Without this knowledge my baby's furniture now doesn't match and because the changing table looks like this:
So while it looks awesome, yours truly now gets to spend another 35 hours resanding and restaining his son's crib. This time, there won't be any clumps, mistakes in color of stain, and all in all it will probably take me closer to 70 hours to do since this time I'm going to get it right and there will be no third resanding and restaining at the Grindy home.

I said all that to say this. I respect my dad more and more with each day that passes in this pre-fatherhood journey that I'm sure will increase exponentially once my son comes into this world. The reason in this particular episode was the ridiculousness that is children's furniture. We got the changing table from Fedex in a box maybe 5 feet by 3 feet. When I came home that night I saw it and thought, "No problem, I'll knock this out in an hour." Three and a half hours later I was done with the last drawer. Let me tell you, that crap was frustrating. The pieces weren't the highest quality and thus did not all fit together as illustrated in the perfection that is the instruction booklet. Yes, I did look at it and no I'm not less of a man because if you'd have worked on this thing with me you'd have been just as frustrated and wanted to burn it all down like I did. About halfway through this adventure I was sitting there with my head in my hands, a melted root beer float on the floor next to me, and my wife sitting on the floor nearby being extremely supportive. It was at this point that I asked her to leave the room because I didn't want her to see me flip out on this inane inanimate object. Once she was gone, I said a quick prayer to calm down, and had a minor epiphany. I reflected on all the furniture, beds, toys, bikes, basketball hoops, game tables, legos, etc. that my dad built for me and realized how many countless hours he must have spent putting that stupid crap together for the love of his son, and never once complaining to my brother and I about how frustrated he got doing it. Either that, or he's an instructional genius and always got the job done without a hitch, broken/missing part, glue/tape, or problem of any kind. I love my dad, but I tend to think since we come from the same gene pool, it was the former. In any event, thanks dad. I owe you big time, but I have a feeling that debt is about to be paid off here in the course of the next 18 years. Happy belated Father's Day!
P.S. No, I didn't forget that my mom did stuff for me too. This is just a reflection on the construction of kids crap, so don't get all upset mom! Thanks for allowing forceps to pull me out, I know you won't let me forget :)

another one bites the dust

2008-06-15T14:57:00.001-07:00

I had court again last Friday, and the guy never showed, so rack up another one for Officer Grindy, 5-0 baby!

On a more sour note, one option violators have in California is what's called a trial by declaration, or as we call it, trial by deck. How it works is the violator writes a letter to the court outlining their side of the story, the officer does the same in a more formal fashion, the judge reads both and issues a verdict. I had my first two of these the other day and came out batting .500. For the same violation, same circumstances, same observations, same narrative on my part, and I won one and lost one. The only difference is one lady tried to get out of her car and I slammed the door in her face and made her late to take her 12 yr old son to his tutor appointment because he couldn't walk the 300 feet to the house by himself, and the other lady was super nice and ran the stop sign at 35 mph because she didn't see it and was from Washington so its an out of state violator. None of those factors should have anything to do with whether they're guilty or not except whether or not I saw them run the stinkin' stop sign!!! Oh well, what're you gonna do? Next time.

the first 50,000 volts is always the best

2008-06-08T20:29:00.000-07:00

Let me start by saying that I know. I'm not very quick to keep up on my posts lately, that's what day 5 of 7 and over 62 hours can do to a man, especially when you're down 3 deuce (see prior post for definition) reports, 1 deuce crash report, 1 semi vs. a mercedes report, and 1 solo vehicle major injury rollover report. But I digress. Last Monday will be the official anniversary of my very first tasering! I found a deuce in an adv (a disabled vehicle) from a bol (be on the lookout) and he wouldn't exit his car. I tried once to physically remove him and he resisted, so I called for a second unit and when he arrived, TASER TASER! It produced the desired result and the subject exited the vehicle promptly and complied from then on out. Man, what a rush. I've heard from sources that some doubted whether I could do it or not and by God's grace proved them wrong. Granted, it was a pretty low key situation, but still took a quick trigger pull. And for those of you sickos who are wondering, no I didn't video tape it! (although I may have wanted to). For explicit details a phone call, like one from Dave Wisner, will produce a full story of the events with Grindy-esque sound effects. Thanks for your prayers to fulfill my dream!

The craziness that is a judge

2008-06-08T20:23:00.000-07:00

I had another court case last Friday, and like Grindy's do (ok, not always) I won. Barely. The judge has this thing against cops and a passion for the defendant that is asinine. The judge even asked how long I had been a sworn officer. As if that has any relevance as to whether or not I can observe someone wearing a seatbelt! Anyway, I also forgot to add in a forfeit I had two weeks before that. Now the score is Grindy 4, Crazies 0, still batting a .1000! Oh, and I do have to point out per a comment from my good friend Mark that I should explain my copspeak. A deuce is copspeak for DUI, and a hook, is an arrest, so if I said I haven't hooked a deuce in a while, it means I haven't arrested a person for driving under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol in a while. More copspeak to come, it might become a new sidebar, but I don't know if there's enough copspeak to last more than a few weeks.

Purpose Driven Crap

2008-05-27T02:36:00.000-07:00

I just saw these videos posted on a few blogs I read. They're radio broadcasts from The Way of the Master radio program with a clipped Q&A from Rick Warren. If what he's saying is true its very disturbing and sad. Here Willow Creek is finally going off of teaching the bible from the pulpit as its main draw instead of attempting to appeal to the community and failing, and Saddleback is going the opposite direction. Very sad. The first one is around 7 minutes, but is worth watching to know what thousands of Christians are buying into. The second is just a continuation of the first and is not as disturbing, but if you need completion, there it is. Enjoy...I guess that's not the right word. Uh, how about just watch.

Seatbelts

2008-05-26T15:55:00.000-07:00

I've been on a deuce funk lately. Haven't been able to hook a deuce since the beginning of the month. However, I have run into every single sleepy, cell phone inept, new car gadgets, deuce looking driver in Santa Barbara. Here's one from the other night. This lady almost collided with another car, wanted to pull into the center divide instead of the right shoulder, and missed the exit she was being instructed to. I walk up on the car and she doesn't speak any English. To understand what I'm saying she yells toward the back of the car and three little kids pop up in pajamas laying down in the very back of a jeep cherokee. Amazing. This lady even had a California driver's license. I can't believe that people don't seatbelt themselves, but to allow their kids, 5, 6, & 11, to lay down in the back of the car. This lady was driving like she was drunk and eventually would have crashed and ejected her kids and then you know what comes next. Please, please, please, seatbelt your kids. Seriously.

Silly Games

2008-05-18T18:25:00.000-07:00

So this thing has been floating around the blogosphere called "Tagging." Basically you list these things and if your name pops up in someone's "Blogs that I read" you do the same thing. It's like a new age chain letter. Kinda corny but I have to admit you look forward to your name being listed like a school yard team picking! Katy and I decided we would each do one, mine here and hers here. Check our blog out for Katy's answers. We can thank Nicole Pickard for loving us enough to be tagged, thanks Nicole!

4 Jobs I've Had:
Video Game Player (Youth Pastor)
Burger Flipper (Burger King)
Brown Truck Stocker (UPS)
Deuce Hooker (CHP)

4 Places I've lived:

Scott AFB, ILRoseville, CA
San Luis Obispo, CA
Buellton, CA
(Missing 5 Towns)

4 Shows I watch on t.v.:

LOST
The Office
Heroes
24

4 Blogs that I read:

The Davidson's
The Squires'
The Jones'
The Ferguson's
*Now it's your guys' turn to have people do this goofy list!

4 Favorite Foods:

Pepperoni Pizza
BBQ Ribs
Sandwiches
Chips and Salsa

4 Places I'd rather be right now:

Heaven of course!
Kauai, Hawaii
Home with my wife, dog and unborn baby boy
Europe? Never been, would like to go

4 Things to look forward to this year:

Watching Katy give birth to and raise our son
The month off I'll get when he's born
Our college friends yearly houseboating trip
Getting out of debt

Cubicle comparisons

2008-05-12T15:55:00.000-07:00

I was reading a friend's blog recently and he and his wife both have their own offices per se and they each took pictures of them to display where they work since they talk about work and people might want to see it. This made me think, "Hey, maybe I could try and get a picture of my work because people might want to see it." Then I realized, "Oh crap, I'm not really allowed to do that." Not because I work in an extremely high confidential office, just that I'm a rookie and it might look a bit weird if I walked around taking pictures. So I changed it up a bit. This is still my office but just more of a mobile type. Not the best picture, but hopefully you get the idea.

Guess what?!?!

2008-05-01T23:14:00.000-07:00

Alright so to be able to know what Katy and I are going to have you need to click here. Pretty sweet! After a couple of days I'll comment on it in another post.

Are you kidding me?

2008-04-30T12:59:00.000-07:00

In light of being on the road alone for the last month, I came across this picture from the Pyromaniacs blog. I've had to help manage a couple of nasty accidents that involved the closure of some or all lanes of a particular section of US-101, but nothing like this. I can't even begin to think how I would handle this except to say I'd be down on my knees asking for two things: one, for God to take me into his kingdom at that exact moment, and two, for grace and kindness upon the people who have to try and get home with something like that blocking their way. I think this happened a while back, nonetheless, God's mercy on those first responders who had to deal with it.

Seriously?

2008-04-24T20:49:00.000-07:00

My buddy Dan stopped this lady today for doing 91 in a 65. Here's their conversation. No joke. People in Santa Barbara are very interesting.

Dan "Why were you going so fast?"
Lady "I'm late for work."
Dan "You still shouldn't be going so fast. Where do you work?"
Lady "I own a breast implant surgery center."
Dan "Oh, ok."
Lady "Do you like them?"
Dan "...License and registration please."

Sad state of affairs

2008-04-24T20:35:00.000-07:00

It is quintessential to a life without Christ. I don't want to bum you all (and by all I mean the 3 readers) out, but I saw something today that broke my heart.

I just finished giving a guy a seatbelt ticket in the parking lot of a local gas station. A man approached me and said, "Officer, there's a lady passed out over by that butane tank." I drove over to the tank and saw a sad sight. There was a lady half on the pavement, half in the bushes, her face buried in the shrubs, urine stained pants, and a six pack of 24oz Bud Light next to her hip. My first thought was, "Lord please let her be alive." I called out, "Ma'am are you okay?" several times with no reponse. I shook her knee trying to rouse her and finally saw her ribcage rise and fall. Within the next couple of minutes I finally helped her get up to her feet and start to walk back to the motel she was living out of. The one thing that stuck in my head was this that she said, "My church is supposed to be helping me." Are they? Are they required, obligated to help her? How much is she supposed to help herself? Ultimately leading me to the question, can she help herself? The answer quickly came, "Not without Christ." Without Christ we all could be flat on our faces in a bush, passed out from intoxication, laying in a puddle of our own urine, wishing for someone or something to come along and help us out.

It saddens me that I had to see this today, but gives me hope that maybe someone from her church might enlighten her with the message of the gospel and that the spirit would enter into her life causing a dramatic change. Nonetheless, one of many quintessential examples of what any of our lives would be without Christ.

Court case #2

2008-04-24T20:24:00.001-07:00

I'm almost a week late in this, but I did have my second court case last Friday. A stop light violation. The gist of it is that I had a green light for 3-5 seconds, this guy turned right in front of me without stopping at his limit line. He brings in a bunch of pictures to the court, fumbles over his words, and gets made fun of by the judge. Grindy's win. Its what we do...when God wills it.

Comparison to a Mountain

2008-04-14T21:21:00.001-07:00

Today I broke down and purchased my first country album from iTunes (notice I said from iTunes, not my first country album purchase), by a guy I like (not like that homophobes) Rodney Atkins. As I was listening on the way home I caught one of the lines from his song "My Old Man" that goes like this:

'Cause my folks are just like mountains, I looked at from afar.
But now the closer I get to them, the bigger they are.

Once I heard that I thought about how true that is to our relationship with God. Early in our walks we stare in awe and wonder at His majesty, even though we are far away from Him. Yet the more intimate and closer we get to Him, the longer we walk with Christ, the more we realize how amazing, vast, and magnificent He truly is. Ponder on this during your day. Hopefully it strikes you as it did me.

Court case #1

2008-04-11T17:20:00.000-07:00

I got to attend court for the first time today on a speed case. The short of it is, I won. The long of it is, I got accused by the defendant as "fingering my weapon" at her. I wish I could make this stuff up. She actually said that to the judge. The only way I "fingered" my weapon at her was if pointing my left index finger is considered a weapon. Crazy people. I know I haven't blogged in a while, I'll try and get better at posting again. My schedule keeps getting switched around and it's messing with my mind. Cool stories though, so I'll try and get them up soon. In the meantime, I'm going to add a sidepost to my blog entitled "Rob's Court Record." So far, "Officer Grindy: 1; Crazies: 0"

Jesus on Idol

2008-04-11T17:17:00.000-07:00

I feel like I was watching some kind of surreal dream in my head. My idol Jesus Christ on American Idol. Last week Dolly Parton sung about Him, and then commented on her own relationship with Him. This week, on the results show, the top 8 opened with "Shout to the Lord." The real song. Not a fake. Not money or other lords. Our Lord. On Idol. If you don't believe me, go to iTunes and just preview the song. Unreal. No idea why it happened, Katy thought it might be that the top 8 got to pick the song. I have no clue, but nonetheless, this doesn't happen very often on nationally syndicated television. Almost as cool as the ER episode I blogged about earlier. Pretty sweet.

Joining the Contextualization Discussion...Kind of

2008-03-19T15:44:00.000-07:00

Once again it seems that MacArthur has stirred the pot among reformed circles in one of his Shepherd's Conference talks. I honestly think he does it on purpose to arouse discussion and keep us all on our toes. Where I stand you might ask? Somewhere in the middle. I know, I know, lukewarm gets spit out, Satan owns the fence, all that jazz. Whatever, it's not the Gospel so BACK OFF!!! On a softer note, the boys over at Fide-O linked this all too appropriate representation of contextualization with the iPod representing the Gospel (oh the blasphemy!) and Microsoft contextualizing it. Taken a bit far, but still the point gets brought home quite well. Hopefully this will enlighten some of you as to what contextualization even means. I know it did for me.

GUITAR HERO III!!!

2008-03-17T01:44:00.000-07:00

While patiently waiting for my updated version of Turbo Tax to download, I've been killing time with my Wii. About a month ago Katy allowed, and by allowed I mean I left her in the car while I ran into Gamestop to "just see if they have Guitar Hero" and low and behold they did! Well I couldn't pass up the opportunity so I got my stinkin' mitts on it, handed over my check card, signed the paper, and walked out the door, Les Paul in hand. Let me tell you, on Easy mode, it's pretty stinking easy. Medium mode, that's my bread and butter. Hard mode, the song "One" and "Raining Blood" are just too fast for me, leaving me helpless to beat the level. Now, on to tonight. I'm about halfway through Expert and there is not much greater satisfaction in the gaming world than to get 5 stars on Expert mode on songs like "My Name is Jonas" by Weezer. Pretty freakin' sweet. I know, I know. Its no Xbox 360 and I agree. Which as a side note does leave me longing to play Rock Band. However, a wireless guitar is pretty sick. Good times. Its especially gratifying when yo see your mom and dad trying to play along to songs they remember and struggling, but continuing to retry the song to get past it and on to the next one. Again, good times. Good times.

training

2008-03-04T17:33:00.001-08:00

So I'll be very interested to hear some of your stories after I post my comments on training. I've been at this radar training class for the last two days. We're supposed to have 24 hours total. I'm rapidly learning that those 24 hours could be cut down to a nice easy 3. That's all. Just 3 hours. This information is not that difficult on why with the proper court testimony you could never lose a radar locked speed case. And yet here I sit for 8 endless hours in a classroom wishing I was on the road. Oh well, I'm still getting paid for it. I'd love to hear how your time has been wasted in fruitless training hours. I guarantee reading your stories of boredom will be infinitely more interesting than my time spent in Radio Detection and Ranging.

Pictures On Duty and Post-Modernism

2008-02-21T11:47:00.001-08:00

So I guess this picture is ok to post. There might be some copyright infringements involved so I'll say this picture came from KSBY's broadcast the night of the protest. There I'm covered. I'm in the middle. No riot shield, just a helmet, sunglasses, and my baton.

Ok, and this video, is sweet. It's a dying man's plea to a woman chaplain on ER to believe in God. 24 side note, I think the chaplain is Michelle from 24. I'll say I was skeptical at first. What a great view on what incorrect theology and the post-modern mind can develop into. My mom pointed out to me that we don't know the rest of the story for this episode or what the intention really was, but from a Christian perspective it brings about a sweet truth and reality. Anyway, here it is:

Protesters

2008-02-15T16:19:00.001-08:00

This past Tuesday I was able to put on my full riot gear for the first time. Some group decided they would protest the war in Iraq by stirring up the students at UCSB for some conference being held there. This would also be the first time I got to go "hands on" with the public. Anyway, KSBY, a local channel here in SB, video taped it and I'm in it. It's about a minute through and only plays with WMP, but you're welcome to take a look. Click here to watch and select the 2nd search item, UC Santa Barbara students protest university for hosting Army research .... I have quite a few thoughts about this protest and others like it, but since it's now related to my job, again, it's just one of those things you'll have to talk with me about in person.

Trying to stay safe and keep my mouth shut,
Rob

here we go a tazering a tazering we go!

2008-02-04T22:34:00.000-08:00

So it's official. The tazer is awesome. You see, we got trained in it today. I was not stupid enough however (sorry Justice) to volunteer to be tazed, but I did get to see 5 of my fellow officers take the full 5 second ride. Basically, these prongs shoot out of a cartridge at over 350 feet/sec and spread at a rate of 8 degrees every foot, or basically 1 foot for every 7 feet travelled, and they have what look like fish hooks on them and imbed in the skin, sending 50,000 volts of electricity through your body, immobilizing your sensory nervous system. This completely incapacitates the subject allowing the officer to gain physical control of them, i.e. handcuffs. So my answer to whether this is inhumane or not is this. Tazering is now spelled a-w-e-s-o-m-e! Check out these videos from youtube. Sorry, can't show you any of the ones I took from today unless you come see us in SB!

To learn about the tazer click here. And for the future of tazering, click here. Otherwise, watch the movies below:

300 lb man goes down like a sack of potatoes

Bull being tazered

Dog being tazered

once again, be careful how you answer

2008-02-03T19:52:00.000-08:00

So if there's one thing I've learned on this job, which would be a lie because I learn new things daily, most of the time hourly, it's this: don't admit fault to a violation. This is not to say lie, however, sometimes we law enforcement types like to use what is called verbal judo. Let me give you an example of this verbal judo.

I was looking straight ahead at a stop sign and out of the corner of my eye saw what looked to be a car speed through a stop sign to my right. So we pull her over and I tell her why we stopped her. She immediately says, "Where? At the park stop sign back there? I stopped completely and my sister was driving right behind me and can vouch for me." Well, needless to say, I immediately doubted myself and thought, "Well, I didn't see her approach the limit line, so maybe she did stop." So I cut her loose with a warning. Next example.

We're stopped at a stop light when the light turned green. I wasn't watching directly the car approaching the left turn lane opposite me, but after a second of green light, the car turned left (to my right) in front of me without speeding, just nonchalantly driving through the intersection. Again, did not see him approach, but assumed he ran the light. We light him up and I make my approach and state what I thought I saw. "Evening sir, the reason I stopped you was because you ran that red arrow back there." Period. The end. Next question coming that didn't escape my lips, "Can I see your license, registration and proof of insurance?" Never happened. The violator replied to my statement about the arrow by saying, "Yeah I thought I was too far away but I risked it anyway and ran it." Case closed. Thanks for the stat. Sign in the red box.

Here's the lesson. If you did something wrong, answer only the questions asked of you. If you didn't do something wrong and you know it, make your case, after you give the officer your license, because he may not have seen what he's claiming, but merely caught a glance of what he thought was wrong. After all, we're human and just as undeserving of God's grace as everyone else. And speaking as one who's been humbled too many times to count already in a month of official law enforcement duties, I can always be humbled again by stopping an innocent person. But it is still kinda fun to catch a guilty one I must admit. Ok, really fun.

crazy rain and snow!

2008-01-24T23:55:00.000-08:00

So rain = accidents on the highway patrol. Quite a few so far this week. My favorite, if that's allowed, so far was today. This guy ended up having the craziest name in the world. I'm going to hide it a bit, so you'll have to highlight it with your cursor to see it. It sounds just like it's spelled, but the "k" is silent. Here it is: kshitij. Oh, and it snowed on Tuesday. No joke. Snow in Santa Barbara. Who'da thunk?

click the pic to credit the photographer

answers to questions that make me chuckle

2008-01-20T11:24:00.000-08:00

Usually before I allow the person I've stopped to talk I say, "Good (whatever time of day it is) sir/ma'am, the reason I stopped you was ____." But this time I didn't even have a chance to speak when I heard this:

"Did I just run that stop sign back there?"

Ummmm. How do I say it kindly without laughing. Yes.

As I'm receiving the contact's information I look over and there's a seatbelt dangling on the driver's side. So while they're looking for stuff, I ask:

"Have you been wearing your seatbelt?"

To which the contact replies:

"Oh no, we're just going right up the street."

Ding ding ding. We have a winner. It's two for one day here at the highway patrol.

Oh, and by the way:

first big adrenaline rush

2008-01-17T23:37:00.000-08:00

Tonight was pretty stinking sweet. We got a call of a request for assist from the SO (sheriff) and I got to drive with my butt on fire, lights and siren wailing en route. Also, I almost got in my first pursuit when this lady failed to yield and weaved back and forth thinking we were an ambulance. Crazy, crazy, crazy. How they give out DL's to some people I have no idea, but by God's grace I barely got mine (76, needed a 70). Anyway, the Lord continues to keep me safe and sound by His mercy alone. Again, sorry about the lack of details, call for more info. The picture below is from our cadet party of me and Katy. Remember that jaw line...it may be the last time you see it on me. I hope not, but let's be rational.

nothing new except this...

2008-01-13T00:34:00.000-08:00

As I well know, this blog generates a high rate of exposure to the blogging world, which is why all 5 of you will be disappointed in that I have no exciting highway patrol stories to report. The last few days have been full of the deuce crash report I took the other night, and a few tickets here and there where I stumbled all over myself and came home hyped up on Rockstar, Red Bull, or whatever the choice energy drink of the night was. Which is why I've inserted a picture for your salivary glands to work overtime on. A new flavor of Rockstar that I came across tonight that tastes just like the Hawaiian Punch I used to drink from the junior high vending machine. Have a glance and salivate on me:

I know, kind of a crappy picture, but try it. It's awesome

first of many

2008-01-10T23:37:00.000-08:00

I worked last night. Let me explain to you how things go as a first time officer. You're basically on "break-in" for the first 55 days of your officer career. The first 5 are office/area orientation, basic stuff, getting to know your beats and fellow officers. Then the next 45 are split into 3 phases, of which i am now in the first phase. the first day of each phase is called "limbo day" where you don't get graded and it's sort of a free day, for lack of a better term. the last day i wrote about was my actual limbo day, so last night i actually drove the car and was intending on a ticket filled night. wrong. an hour into my shift shortly after citing someone and lighting them up for my first time, we got dispatched to a traffic collision, henceforth known as tc, where to make a long story short and basically avoid any legal ramifications since i don't know what i'm aloud to write about and what i'm not, i took my first tc and hooked (arrested) my first deuce (DUI) as a result. quite thrilling and nerve wrecking all at the same time. it's a pretty big deal to get that first one under your belt, almost like your first pursuit, fatal crash, or felony stop. can't post much more publicly, but if you ask you might get the 15 minute story firsthand ! thanks for your prayers. here's a good ol' pic from my academy days of me walking through a cloud of nerve gas. ah the academy. sniff. my buddy graham is currently enduring hardship there. sniff sniff. but it's so worth it!

God's mercy alone

2008-01-10T23:05:00.001-08:00

Well I have officially completed my first real day as an officer in the highway patrol, including my first ticket, missing tail light. Exciting. Right after I got the first one under my belt, I realized
that it was only by God's mercy that I made it through at all which helped me to reflect on His goodness in that allowance. We are so small and especially in comparison to Him. That's how this picture came about as being tied into my blog. After months of silence I thought it appropriate to tie a random picture from last summer to my first completed day with the highway patrol. But again, if you were paying attention, the picture and the reflection are totally related.
God is big, we are small, yet he still loves us and counts the hairs on our head. Amazing. I also just realized, I look kinda pregnant in this picture. Oh well. God is even more good because I dont have a bun in the oven.

Sent from my iPhone

our new area: Santa Barbara!

2007-11-14T21:22:00.000-08:00

It's official...Katy and I are going to be sent to Santa Barbara after I graduate. More to follow, and yes, I know my blogs suck as of late.

halfway point

2007-09-15T12:27:00.000-07:00

Well devoted ones who have me on google reader...this wednesday at 1100 hours will mark the halfway point of my training at the CHP academy. it's been a pretty crazy ride, one that I hope I'll be able to blog about once i'm finished, but if i gave you all the details now, i'd have to kill you. not really, but i'm not allowed to talk about everything since i'm still in it. i will give you some highlights though:

total weight lost: 27 pounds
total body fat % lost: 10%
hours in my average day: 15
weapon i carry everyday: .40 cal S&W
fastest i've driven here: 107 mph
weeks on the training table (i.e. fat boy line): 12 1/5
weeks off the training table (i.e. i'm not starving): 4/5

finally, here's a link to our "cadet blog" and a picture of me drilling:

it may be hard to tell, but i'm right in the middle of the shot.

anyway, say some prayers for me. the field is ripe in law enforcement and there are a lot of souls God can save out there. pray that he would use me every step of the way for his glory.

be sure of your target and what is beyond
rob

last but not least

2007-06-06T14:52:00.000-07:00

12 days left. That's how long I have until I start the CHP academy in West Sacramento, a time of 27 weeks, so until December 21st, where I'm there everyday and night, except Wednesday's from 5pm-12am, and Friday's at 5pm through Sunday's at 12am again. Pretty intense. All of this basically means that I won't be blogging for at least six months...which also explains why I haven't been keeping up at all on my blog. Katy and I found out about 3 weeks ago and have been trying to get all my ducks in a row since then. We also moved into a rental house in old town roseville, pretty sick, but again prolonging my surfing time. I might, and this is a big might, get a chance to write a few before I go in on the 18th of June, but there's a lot of loose ends to tie up. Anyway, send me an email if you want to comment on anything or just let me know what's going on. Grace and peace!

Wegget Wednesday no. 5

2007-05-04T03:34:00.001-07:00

I know that it's Friday and the title says Wednesday. I composed this two days ago and just realized that I hit save as draft instead of publish. Sue me. I also know I haven't been keeping up very well with any of my posts, especially the sermon ones. My lame excuse is I started a new job this week at Costco, last Thursday, and have been working from 4am-10:30am on average. Yesterday, today, and tomorrow I'm working the 12am-8:30am shift. It's messing with my head. In any event, here's a few Weggets from this week to check out.

Mark Driscoll's thoughts that are soaring around the blogosphere. Read some of the backlash here.

Most awesomest boxing video ever.

I'm always in awe of kids playing way better than me. Check this one out.

I played Guitar Hero II for the first time weekend before last. I'd played the first one before. Man I'm glad I don't have a 360 or I'd be on it all the time. Here's an amazing take of Stairway from it.

Which do you know more of? 90's or 80's? Let it load all the way through first, it's quicker just to skip to each one then really devote an hour of your time. I'm apparently a cartoon freak for the 80's! Down with Pikachu!

How to beat 9 Grand Master champions at the same time. A little long, but well worth the reveal.

When I was 10 I loved Back to the Future. Check out what Biff's doing now.

Wegget Wednesday no. 4

2007-04-23T23:39:00.000-07:00

Here's this Wednesday's Weggets. Don't get too offended.

Muffins. Give this one some time.

Great lego pic.

This reminds me of that old show on Comedy Central, Mystery Science Theater 3000, except put to a sermon. I think Joel would understand.

20 year's worth of Desiring God pastor's conferences. All free. Does it get much better?

i-monk's thoughts on the book Listening to the Beliefs of Emerging Churches. While I haven't read the book, very similar thoughts on emergent as a whole.

Since getting married, I've fallen over to the dark side and become a fan of country music. Jeff Foxworthy defends it here and ignores the cheers of the crowd to plow through his reasoning. Not as funny as you might suppose, but surprising nonetheless.

Lord of the Beards.

These guys were in Sac-town recently and referenced on Vitamin Z's posts. Here's a video. Click here to get a list of 66 of them. You can also listen to some on budlight.com but you have to enter your b-day, still worth it!

Finally, I love Piper, but apparently he's bad. Great reformers alongside him as well.

Matrix = Pomo

2007-04-20T01:35:00.000-07:00

Before going to bed tonight I caught the last hour of the Matrix Reloaded, the second chapter of the Matrix trilogy by the Wachowski brothers. A startling realization came to me as Neo spoke with the Architect at the source. The Matrix trilogy is a metaphor to postmodern thinking. 99% of the humans in the Matrix believe the lie, that there is a truth. Well, the truth of that truth is that it's a lie. The Matrix is fictional and where Zion resides, the real world, is the actual truth. As Neo is dialogging with the Architect, the elderly white haired man states, in a nuthshell, that there is no choice even in the real world, that it is all controlled. What Neo ends up proving by breaking the system is that there really is no truth, that it's whatever you make of it as he breaks the mold of the anomalies, resurrects Trinity, and ultimately controls the machines when he gets back to the real world.

Funny, when I was actually watching these movies in the early 00's, I had no knowledge of what pomo thought was, and now, after having been mildly educated, I realize how the two are connected and how the Wachowski brothers inevitably defined pomo philosophy purposefully. True postmoderns would say that there is no truth, just your version. That's the Matrix.

Anyway, I'm not expounding on this too much because it is just a movie, and I do obviously disagree with postmoderns on the point of truth, so it's really a silly connection. If you know the Matrix I'd like to hear the connections you've made. If you don't, forget it and just stay in your own personal Matrix!

Oh, and I do realize that I'm about 5 years behind on discussing this, but I can honestly say, that 5 years ago, I had no idea what a blog was, so I couldn't, and now I can. Phbbbt!

The End and the Beginning and Piper

2007-04-18T01:16:00.000-07:00

I finished Donald Miller's Blue Like Jazz the other night. Quite exciting let me tell you. He definitely caught my eye with a lot of his thoughts, and I enjoyed his journal like discourse on non-religious thoughts on Christian spirituality. Overall, probably an A-, not that I'm some famous book critic.

What's funny is sometime ago I decided to do some reading of Emergent leaders' books to give them a fair shot, see if they were truly off as some reformed bloggers have stated. Miller definitely ran against the grain. But then tonight. Oh tonight.

Tonight I began Rob Bell's Velvet Elvis.

When I used to be just a youth assistant the head guy used some Nooma vids that I thought were awesome. Still do in fact. Thought this book would be too. Started out pretty rough though.

He split Christian Orthodoxy into two camps in his first chapter Jump. Trampolines and brick walls. Guess which one he is? Yup. The fun one. A very weak paraphrase is, if you aren't inviting people into the fun life of celebration as a Christian, you're telling them that you have a brick wall, and all the "in" people are behind the brick wall. Very black and white from someone who doesn't seem to think theology in itself can be black and white. It just went downhill from there. From odd takes on the virgin birth to quips about how God loved the world that He gave His only Son because He is love (not that it brings Him the most glory) to stating the opinion that questioning God is central to the essence of Christianity, the rest of the chapter had me shaking my head Ben Candee style and vigorously writing notes in the margins with multiple question marks next to them, underlining and bracketing on points I was dumbfounded by not that because they were necessarily good points. I think I just wrote the worst run on sentence ever. As my wife would say, "Good job English major!" But I digress.

Here's what left me stunned. As he came to close out his point that we should be inviting people into the "way" with Christ instead of just talking about it, he wrote the following quote, "The point is our joy. That is when God is most pleased." with a footnote attached that said this, "Read everything John Piper has ever written, beginning with The Dangerous Duty of Delight" which made my jaw drop once again. A Piper reference?! Really?! Two pages after you call Sean Penn, tongue in cheek, but nevertheless, a great theologian of our time? What are you doing to my delicate balance of critique in love Rob Bell?!

Obviously, righting it.

Even when I say I'm going to start reading a book, watching a movie, checking a blog, etc., with the utmost objectivity, I never do. I'm just a big fat ugly stinking crappy lying sinner. Here I was, reaming a man for his honesty and willingness to have hundreds read all about it, and the man respects one of the men I respect enough to say, "Read everything John Piper." Amazing God, truly amazing.

So, needless to say, later today when I start chapter 2, I'll be doing so with a little crumb of humble pie still hanging off my flavor saver. While I still may not agree with some or many of the things Bell says, I won't be grumbling in my heart at him about it to the One who knows all that we both worship and adore.

Post script: just because someone endorses Piper, doesn't make me credit them with infallibility, nor does it mean that I have a man-crush on Piper. It just means, people's intentions aren't always what you may think they are, and sometimes it's best to make fun of yourself in a blog about it for others to have a giggle about before they realize it's true of them and I giggle back and then repent.

Wegget Wednesday no. 3

2007-04-18T01:15:00.001-07:00

Two days ago as I was collecting a little bit, I thought I had nothing. But my contacts came through in the eleventh hour. Let me know how it compares to last week and what I can do better next Wegget Wednesday!

Classic sports blooper.

How a mouse arrow really works. Make sure you scroll into the circle.Phil Johnson's article about Dan Kimball. You have to scroll through a bit to get to their dialogue, but it's worth it. Maybe some thoughts from me later, or you can just go to this post I published a while back. Pretty much the same old stuff.Vitamin Z posted this slideshow from a while back.

At first, I was like "Nooooo!" but then, after watching the whole thing, I was like "WHOAH!"

DCB's church UCB has an awesome ministry resource called Highway Video. I especially like the vids pillow fight and Crowder's own Color Song. You have to type them in the search function, but it's worth it. Definitely too expensive to actually buy though for what might be a one time use.

One more for good measure, only 14 seconds long. Keep your eye on the little panda, watch again for the mama panda's reaction now that you know where the sound is coming from.

Why I Missed Church

2007-04-16T11:12:00.000-07:00

Yesterday my wife, my parents and I went up to my mom's parents' house for a belated Easter celebration. We were supposed to be back in time for our church service which starts at 5, but things happened. Here was our schedule:

12:07 - leave grace group
1:07 - arrive in Sutter Creek, CA
3:13 - finish lunch
3:14 - parents start their Israel trip slideshow
4:35 - leave Sutter Creek, CA
5:29 - arrive back at Garate's where our car is
5:30 - realize by the time we'd get up to church Josh would be halfway through his sermon
5:41 - get home to find out door is broken and can't fix it
7:32 - maintenance finally gets to the house and fixes door so we can sleep peacefully

Weird night I know. Believe me, it was a great time of fellowship and family up in the foothills of the Sierra Nevada, I was sad to miss church (for the 2nd time in 3 weeks!!!), but I know it was good also to be refreshed with loved ones. On that note, the sermon actually got recorded this week so I'll be able to download it and give a summary later this week. Until then, pray that I get a job! I'm going insane!!!

The Making of A New Man

2007-04-12T00:53:00.000-07:00

I believe it was Ligon Duncan, a pastor who spoke at this year's Shepherd's Conference, who reads 7-10 books a week. That, if you'll forgive me for being crass, is a crapload of books! Right now I'm reading 5, not including my bathroom reading of Calvin & Hobbes, and it is a bit overwhelming at times. One that I didn't give much of a chance to when I started, was Donald Miller's Blue Like Jazz, and for that, Donald, I am sorry. The only critique I have thus far, and I'm a little over halfway through it, is that it lacks much scripture to support its highly practical "nonreligious thoughts on Christian spirituality." Other than that, I think the book, along with Piper's Desiring God and Owen's Overcoming Sin and Temptation, have been revolutionary for my spiritual walk with my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

After more reflection, I will hopefully right more posts on things Miller shakes me with, but for now I'll stick to one. His concept of grace. In his journal-like entries, he tells stories of himself and others struggles with this pivotal concept. What struck me the most, aside from his openness, was how similar my own struggle with grace has been, and yet unbeknown to my own heart. He describes it as such:

"I love to give charity, but I don't want to be charity. This is why I have so much trouble with grace...I am too prideful to accept the grace of God. It isn't that I want to earn my own way to give something to God, it's that I want to earn my own way so I won't be charity...I will obey God because I love God. But if I cannot accept God's love, I cannot love Him in return, and I cannot obey Him. Self-discipline will never make us feel righteous or clean; accepting God's love will. The ability to accept God's unconditional grace and ferocious love is all the fuel we need to obey Him in return. Accepting God's kindness and free love is something the devil does not want us to do. If we hear, in our inner ear, a voice saying we are failures, we are losers, we will never amount to anything, this is the voice of Satan trying to convince the bride that the groom does not love her. This is not the voice of God. God woos us with kindness, He changes our character with the passion of His love...Our 'behavior' will not be changed long with self-discipline, but fall in love and a human will accomplish what he never thought possible. The laziest of men will swim the English channel to win his woman...In exchange for our humility and willingness to accept the charity of God, we are given a kingdom. And a beggar's kingdom is better that a proud man's delusion." (pgs. 84-86)

My life coincides with these thoughts. It's not that I think I can earn my way into heaven, it's just that I want to go Dutch. I want to hang on to my past sins, as forgiven as they are, just to say to God, "See, I don't deserve what you're giving me. Now please let me help out." I know in my heart that Christ died for all my sins, past, present, and future. The problem is, my mind holds onto them, causes me to dwell on them, allowing the devil the foothold he needs to keep me inches or miles away from the love of my bridegroom. Instead of swooning in the passion of my Lord for me, I wallow in self pity with a weight on my conscience whenever I encounter someone, an old friend who knew me in my time of sin yet not of the heinous act, or a new brother or sister in the Lord, who I feel like should know how sinful I am by learning of my past. Not that that does anything except say to them, "I haven't come to grips with grace just yet."

Tim Keller preached a sermon at the Desiring God conference last year on the supremacy of Christ and the Gospel in a Postmodern world, and in it one of the points he makes on the side is that people can accept the Lord into their heart, they can be baptized, they can learn doctrine, but until they truly understand the magnitude of the Gospel and the grace that ensues, they really haven't gotten it.

I feel like I'm just starting to get it. Almost 10 years after my conversion, and I feel like I should be baptized all over again. I'm getting that goose pimpley feeling, I know it's experiential but bear with me, that I'm close to a landslide of love that will overwhelm me, my life, my marriage, my ministry, and everyone I come into contact with.

Lord, let not the devil overcome me, but continue Your work of sanctification, provide me with the knowledge of Your grace that can kill off this natural man, and finally bring closer to completion the work You started in me, for a "beggar's kingdom" truly is superior, to a "proud man's delusion."

If you don't beat it down, it will beat you down

2007-04-12T00:40:00.000-07:00

I have the privilege of meeting with two of the guys I respect most in this world, my pastor Josh and my buddy Dave. Once a week we get together and read aloud John Owen's Overcoming Sin and Temptation I've linked it on my sidebar. We don't get through much before our bacon and eggs come from Brookfield's, but I know that if we got through more, I would be a wreck. We don't read any in between meetings, and thus get rocked every Wednesday. This week was no different. This passage really struck me this week, I hope it does you too:

"Sin will not only be striving, acting rebelling, troubling, disquieting, but if let alone, if not continually mortified, it will bring forth great, cursed, scandalous, soul-destroying sins...You know what it did in David and sundry others. Sin aims always at the utmost; every time it rises up to tempt or entice, might it have its own course, it would go out to the utmost sin in that kind. Every unclean though or glance would be adultery if it could; every covetous desire would be oppression, every thought of unbelief would be atheism, might it grow to its head. Men may come to that, that sin may not be heard speaking a scandalous word in their hearts - that is, provoking to any great sin with scandal in its mouth; but yet every rise of lust, might it have its course, would come to the height of villainy: it is like the grave that is never satisfied. And herein lies no small share of the deceitfulness of sin, by which it prevails to the hardening of men, and so to their ruin (Heb. 3:13) - it is modest, as it were, in its first motions and proposals, but having once got footing in the heart by them, it constantly makes good its ground, and presses on to some farther degrees in the same kind. This new acting and pressing forward makes the soul take little notice of what an entrance to a falling off from God is laready made; it thinks all is indifferently well if there be no further progress; and so far as the soul is made insensible of any sin - that is, as to such a sense as the gospel requires - so far it is hardened: but sin is still pressing forward, and that because it has no bounds but utter relinquishment of God and opposition to him; that it proceeds toward its height by degrees, making good the ground it has got by hardness, is not from its nature, but its deceitfulness. Now nothing can prevent this but mortification; that withers the root and strikes at the head of sin every hour, so that whatever it aims at, it is crossed in. There is not the best saint in the world but, if he should give over this duty, would fall into as many cursed sins as ever any did of his kind." (pg. 50-51)

Wegget Wednesday no. 2

2007-04-11T15:03:00.001-07:00

Well, it's the first officially titled Wegget (web nugget) Wednesday edition. Here's what I've collected this week:

I posted a while back a video entitled Sunday's Coming put together by this awesome ministry resource site called Igniter Media. Well, after being encouraged by our pastor Josh, I checked out a bunch more of Igniter's videos, and have decided to post one with each Wegget session. This week's parallels what society wants you to do versus what Jesus has called of you or has done for you. My favorite thing about it is how they take everyday items and objects we see and turn them into the cross. Pretty fantastic. So without further ado, The Crowd or the Cross.

So in a weird conversation on the actual scientific words for gross words, my buddy and I discovered that this word doesn't mean biblical sex, this word does (I won't post the actual words for suspense purposes).

Most have probably seen this already, but worth posting anyway. I present to you, male restroom etiquette.

This program called New Song Cafe via YouTube is awesome. Great ways to learn songs by Crowder, Tomlin, Delirious and others. If you're pomo I guess.

This lady is pretty talented...or at least her looping media is. Check it before you wreck it.

Mario piano? All levels, all sick.

One more day

2007-04-10T12:08:00.000-07:00

Hey guys, don't forget...one more day till the official (I know I did one last week, but it wasn't titled correctly, so scratch it!) opening of WEGGET WEDNESDAY!!! Make sure you check your reader or whatever format you use tomorrow!

A Tad Bit Late

2007-04-09T11:05:00.000-07:00

So I know that good Friday was three and a half days ago, but it's been such a crazy weekend that I didn't have time to post this then. Below is a video that Josh and I used at ASGF's college service on Friday night that he found on Vitamin Z's blog that is actually from Igniter Media. Check it out. I love the 2D paintings moving around.

Jesus at the Master's?

2007-04-08T17:13:00.000-07:00

Let me start this post by stating that my wife is awesome! Usually, I have to whine and beg and plead and give up certain marriage bonuses (wink, wink) to be able to sit down on a Sunday afternoon and just veg on a round of golf. Today was different. I actually got to watch the entire final round of the Master's without any cajoling or swapping of chores. It turned out to be a sweet end to a wacky week of golf.

I must confess, I always root for Tiger. It doesn't matter to me where he is, I always love seeing him crush his opponents. This was no exception. As he drove onto #12 at Augusta National, I was rooting for him to go for the green in 2. When he did, and that ball hung at the back, slowly rolling back down towards the cup, crawling to within 3 feet of the hole, I went nuts. Yelling and hooting and hollering, my wife glanced up over the top of her Macbook at me from the bedroom as if I should be committed. Then the unexpected occurred. This unknown, 1 win 31 year old named Zach Johnson, birdie on 15 & 16, moving to even par on the tournament. Bogeying 17, he parred 18 and hung onto a 2 stroke lead over Tiger with a one over. Meanwhile, Tiger sat at 3 over and hit it to within 12 feet on 16, for a fantastic birdie opportunity. CBS started showing Johnson talk with his wife and supporters near the clubhouse, and still, my heart bled Tiger.

Finally, the 18th hole commentator got to interview Johnson, asking a question that would sway my loyalties: "What was your internal dialog as you walked this round today?" Johnson responed in a way that was completely unexpected. "Well, I wasn't so much dialogging with myself as I was feeling the presence of others. As you know today's Easter, and my faith is very important to me, so I felt Jesus with me the whole way. My grandfather, my family, they were all there with me." WHAT??? Instantly, in my heart I knew, that I was no longer die hard Tiger. Here's a man who was about to win the most prestigious tournament in golf and he attributed it not to himself, but used that time to tell people about how Christ got him through it. Now I'm not one to instantly jump on someone's bandwagon whenever I find out they're a Christian, that would be a dangerous practice. However, with something like golf, where so much is placed on individual talent, concentration, and determination, I can't help but gravitate towards what seems to be a genuine believer. Tiger can definitely be arrogant and haughty at times, and isn't always the greatest role model, but here was a man accrediting his Savior for his success.

I know that I've written more about this event than I did about our services, which is an admitted downfall, so for that I apologize. But, I will be looking forward to the day in 2013 when Tiger's contract with EA sports runs out, and Zach Johnson PGA Tour 2013 comes out for Xbox 1080.

Colossians 1:18-20 - 4.8.07

2007-04-08T16:42:00.000-07:00

This morning ASGF had their services at the Gold Country Fairgrounds in Auburn. I didn't know exactly how it might go, with no childcare being provided and our first experience outdoors, but even with my doubt, God was faithful. The service was awesome! Sure there were the usual distractions, my horrible attempts at harmonizing with our worship leader Brad, a few kids here and there playing loudly, a motocross event going on right behind our stage, but it was still awesome! Brad usually records the sermons, but last weeks and this week he didn't, last time by mistake, this time on purpose. I didn't write down any notes from Josh's message, but I'll attempt to summarize by memory which basically means, this blog post won't be good.

Intro
Josh began this morning with a series of examples about how we are all enslaved to something. Even in our freedom, we're enslaved. He then used the picture of someone learning to play guitar and how if they tried to do it without any chords, theory, or string knowledge, it would sound horrible and they'd never get a record deal. But, with that knowledge, greatness could come about. It's the same with God, we need knowledge of Him and a relationship with Christ to spend eternity in heaven, we can't achieve it on our own.

Point 1, 2, 3, etc.
I didn't hear Josh label different points, he mostly expounded the passage, used a few examples, and I believe his main point was Christ in and of Himself, and our need for Him as a Savior. One of countless ways that a sovereign God is awesome, is that Josh didn't have to switch to a topical sermon today, he merely preached the next set of verses that were up in his series of Colossians, and in it was able to clearly and smoothly lay out the Gospel message. Interestingly enough, the best part was that the passage ended on the cross, so that became the last thing to point out.

Conclusion
I know these notes suck, but I was too self consumed to remember to grab my pen from the stage before leaving it, and forgot that I had taken Katy's checkbook pen out of her purse earlier in the week. What's really lame is that I can't even listen to the sermon again since it wasn't recorded and fix these notes later. In any event, Josh's conclusion was something like this. Jesus has risen, and we need Him to fix our enslavement from sin to God, and the Lord is gracious enough to have offered His Son in our place for our heinous crimes against the Creator of the universe.

He is risen! He is risen indeed!

Coming next Wednesday (Lord willing):

2007-04-05T23:40:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I just realized as I was about to shut down for the night. My newly coined term, Weggets, will now appear solely on Wednesday's, which, for the record, will be dubbed,

WEGGET WEDNESDAYS!

What a lame post, I know, but hopefully a sermon recap sometime before Sunday. Keep checking!

Pop's 47

2007-04-05T23:33:00.000-07:00

Today was my dad's 47th birthday. My mom and I spent it with him having In-N-Out for lunch and then playing 9 at this course in Auburn called Black Oak. Needless to say, we all sucked, but it was fun hanging all day. Katy met us for dinner at BJ's for some pizza but no pazookies. His birthday, though fun, reminded me of something. I don't appreciate my father enough.

Dad wouldn't ever say this, but I be upon examination and study of scripture that he would admit he didn't truly come to Christ until a few years ago. I don't know what sparked it, but all of a sudden there was fruit without prompting and a genuine love of Christ. It has been an awesome privelege to be a part of. That said, it then leads to the fact that most of my life I grew up without a Christian earthly father. Fortunately God saved me anyway, but it does give me a newfound love and respect for my dad. The fact that he's willing at a not-so-young-anymore age to give his life to a man based on faith is awe-inspiring. The fact that he's willing to change decade old habits to fit the holy life God has called him to is heroic, and can only be ascribed to grace.

Don't get me wrong, he displayed Christian ethics long before he was really saved, but what a fantastic witness. When I talk to him now about our walks, he's so honest about his struggles and willing to be vulnerable to his own son, not feeling the need to be a hero, that he actually ends up being one anyway. He's not unlike any of us in that he still sins and struggles through sanctification like any given Christian. But he's real about it.

I don't have a real point to this post, but I will say this. I'm thankful to my heavenly father for giving me such an awesome earthly one. I love you dad! Happy birthday!

My Cool Internet Nuggets...Henceforth dubbed "Weggets"

2007-04-04T22:19:00.000-07:00

I've often found myself talking, showing, forwarding cool things people show me via the world wide web. So far I've just randomly titled them and posted them here on hairyformed. No longer! From now on, they will be called "WEGGETS!" (a combination of the word 'web' and 'nuggets'). Challies has his "A la Carte," Sacred Journey (Mark Traphagen) has his "Mile Posts," and Vitamin Z just did as I'd done and posted it whenever he found it. But for me, it's WEGGETS. And here they are.

Hairyformed proudly presents: WEGGETS

First, a local shout out. I love Cool River Pizza. It is hands down, my favorite pizza in the world. In fact, tonight Katy and I polished off an XL pepperoni by ourselves. That's how good it is. If you love me, vote them the best pizza in the greater Sacramento area by clicking here.

Second, David Crowder Band is currently recording their 6th (All I Can Say, Can You Hear Us, Sunsets & Sushi, illuminate, A Collision, B Collision, am I missing any?) album Remedy. You can check out their blogging of the event here, and watch their first ever music video for the song foreverandever etc... here. If the second link isn't working, I'll check back and fix it later.

Finally, an oldie but goodie, evolution of dance:

New sidebar

2007-03-29T22:30:00.000-07:00

I've ventured out into the HTML world and attempted to create my own sidebar. Kudos to JollyBlogger for the script help, hopefully it wasn't copyrighted, praise God for God! In any event, it shows the books I'm currently reading, not necessarily recommending, just reading, i.e. browsing, parousing, etc. It's on the right hand side if that wasn't obvious.

Grace and peace.

Official Recognition!

2007-03-29T22:22:00.000-07:00

So this is kind of a lame post, I'll try and get caught up on my sermon notes tomorrow, but a little self pat on the back here.

Hey guys, I just want to announce that to me, I have been officially recognized in the blogging world by having my blog shared on Google Reader. Granted, it was by a friend (thanks Tom!), and it wasn't a personally written blog, but a reference to some YouTube vids, and I shouldn't seek the praise of men but God, nonetheless, somebody admired my work! Anyways, check out the picture:

Beatboxing

2007-03-29T02:24:00.000-07:00

First of all, I know I've been posting a lot tonight, but I don't feel too well and don't want to keep Katy up with my restlessness, so explanation given.

Lately I've been very keen on beatboxers. Maybe it was ever since I saw Blake on what my pastor calls, "The Singers," or because when we were at Shepherd's my buddy Drew beatboxed while we flowed spontaneously badly. In any event, check out these two vids

This one is by far my favorite. Amazing, simply amazing:

My buddy Dave showed me this one after he saw Kitchen Diaries. Still pretty ingenious:

FAM

2007-03-29T00:55:00.000-07:00

This is probably going to be my most personal blog to date as it contains extremely personal details and is also sporadic thoughts about different areas of the whole process that I didn’t want to do separate blogs on and just wanted to get my thoughts out. My wife Katy and I have been trying to have a baby since last November, so almost a year and a half. What was initially frustrating about the whole process was hearing friends who decided to start trying and BAM within the first month they were pregnant. Those babies have come out by now and we’re still trying. I don’t need to go into the details of it, but initially we thought there were some infertility issues, but so far everything seems to be okay. I’ve probably prayed more about this than anything else in my life, which compared to getting married, is a lot.

My wife is fantastic. The love of my life. The most beautiful woman alive. She brings joy to my soul and fills my heart with peace. It’s because of these feelings and devotion that more than anything in this world, I want her to be happy and have the desires of her heart. The one thing she yearns for since receiving her salvation has been to become pregnant and carry the baby to term, raising it up to hopefully become a child of God. And yet, I can’t just magically give her that. I must be totally and utterly reliant upon God for this gracious gift to my wife, and it’s because of this dependency that brings me closer to Him.

What has been cool throughout this process of patience has been participating in various capacities within our church, Auburn Sovereign Grace Fellowship. Through the multiple interactions, Sunday morning Grace Groups, Sunday night service, 24 parties Monday night, etc., we’ve been able to witness quite a few different parenting philosophies, discuss it together, and start to develop our own parenting techniques before even having kids. Both the good, the bad, and the okay are on display before our very eyes almost every day, and it’s like going to parenting school before becoming parents!

Through our interactions with God-fearing families we found out about this book called Taking Charge of Your Fertility by Toni Weschler. We started reading it together the other day and its thesis is family planning through 3 means: morning temperature, cervical fluid, & cervix position. Honestly, looking through the book it’s a bit nauseating at first, but it starts to make sense and get you excited about making a baby. It has the woman chart everything, and I mean EVERYTHING! It has fairly proven methods of conception and sadly is mistaken with the Catholic conceived Rhythm Method, which says that a woman ovulates always on day 14 and shockingly is what most doctor’s base their wheel on, a 14th day ovulation.

My prayer is this works, but if it doesn’t, Katy and I will more likely than not start to look seriously at different adoption agencies and take that alternative.

Something related to all this, which one blogger discusses on his site, is how far Christians should go in the planning of their families (the having of kids). At this point in time, I think we’re ready to have kids, and see them as a huge blessing (insert scripture), so we’re willing to have as many as God will allow us, from 0-Katy being unable to safely give birth anymore. That in itself, going for an unknown number of kids, can be pretty scary and still is to a degree, but our faith is in the sovereign God of the universe and the knowledge that He’s in control of all things.

Probably a lot more I’ll write about as we go through the process, but that’s it for now.

Grace and Peace.

Premil, Aumil, Whatmil?

2007-03-29T00:51:00.000-07:00

In case some of you don’t know, there has been a lot of blogging going on about what John MacArthur said in his opening talk at this year’s Shepherd’s Conference. Here’s the jist: he’s a premillenial dispensationalist. To those of us who know what he believes, not a big surprise. For some reason though, this has become a hot topic since the “outburst,” mainly because he ruffled some feathers. Honestly, I’m kinda sick of hearing/reading/talking about it. Maybe my prayer needs to be for wisdom and understanding in eschatology, because the stuff I’m reading is becoming like the teacher in Peanuts, “Wah, wah wah, wah wah.” I’d probably lean towards the amil side, but still couldn’t make a solid defense through scripture of it. My biggest hang up is that Scripture doesn’t seem to say there are two separate second comings. I know people can point to certain passages that seem to say there will be a rapture, but that would mean Christ would have to come back twice, and I just don’t see it. Maybe one of you can clarify this in extremely basic layman’s terms so that I can see the light, but until then, I’m in the dark on it.

Note: I do realize that this is a big deal (Josh!) and should not be taken lightly how Mac went about stating his views, but admittedly, it does become a bit rashy after a while, right?

Hedonistic Joy in Scripture

2007-03-29T00:43:00.000-07:00

This is the first of the promised posts from last week, and yeah, they're a week late so back off!

Our church has these classes we do called Equip classes where every semester or so you take a class with an elder on a variety of topics on anything from marriage to biblical theology to hospitality. My buddy Dave and I are taking a class on worship where every week we go through a chapter of John Piper’s Desiring God, and have a worship jam session afterwards. I just got done reading his chapter on Scripture where he discusses the joy that can be found, as well as the hope and faith, in the Word of God. Most of Piper’s chapters are pretty philosophically deep and tough to get through in one sitting without feeling overwhelmed. This one was no different in that sense, but the practically side had varied in that I actually got it right away. There is one significant quote at the end where he references George Müller, a key figure in developing England’s orphanages. Müller had this to say about the influence of Scripture in his daily walk:

“The first thing I did, after having asked in a few words the Lord’s blessing upon His precious Word, was to begin to meditate on the Word of God; searching as it were, into every verse, to get blessing out of it; not for the sake of the public ministry of the Word; not for the sake or preaching on what I had meditated upon; but for the sake of obtaining food for my own soul. The result I have found to be almost invariably this, that after a very few minutes my soul has been led to confession, or to thanksgiving, or to intercession, or to supplication; so that though I did not, as it were, give myself to prayer, but to meditation, yet it turned almost immediately more or less into prayer.” (emphasis added) – Autobiography of George Müller.

What is amazing about this is how simple it is. Seeking the “bread of life” through Scripture, not prayer or anything else, and then finding prayer seeping out of your careful walk through the Word. I think of my own quiet times and how they’ve become a task to check off and not anything truly fruitful, because of my own ineptitude. This is definitely the new way I want to being my day, meditation that spontaneously leads to joyful prayer and the sustaining of my day!

Manana

2007-03-19T15:21:00.000-07:00

So starting tomorrow is my last session of CAHSEE testing and hopefully I'll remember to bring my laptop and blog it up as well as catch up on some much needed reading.

Things to look forward to:

brackets and my hate of them (b/c I suck!)

thoughts on this whole premil-aumil thing

FAM (stay tuned for the definition of the acronym if you don't know what it is!)

All of these should be posted (Lord willing :)) by Wednesday night as I won't have internet access for the next two days at school, unless I'm smart and bring my flash to transfer the Word files.

Grace and peace.

Colossians 1:3-8 - 3.11.07

2007-03-19T13:57:00.000-07:00

Rebuke and ridicule me. I know I have been blogging in a week, and I also know that I'm a week behind on my sermon notes. It's tough (hear that fiddle in the background?) actually writing it out and not using my laptop, but wah wah wah, here's last week's.

Intro
Josh began the night recounting his time at Logan Waldeck's funeral and how her parents Dan & Cindy reacted. Josh described them as being able to bear the weight of the pain and sorrow only because the Cross is at the center of their lives, as it should be at ours, which is the crux of Colossians.

Christ as Central in Personal Transformation
The church at Colossae was known as growing in faith, love, and hope, but the first thing it displays is the power of prayer. It is this power of prayer that displays the status of your belief, or lack thereof, in the sovereignty of God, since He's the one who changes hearts. So what is it that Paul, the author of Colossians, is praying for?

First of all, faith (Romans 4:1-8). We all live by faith, but the question is, faith in what? Our job, relationships, material posessions? These Colossians had faith in Christ, which is where our faith needs to be, becoming our strenght and fulfillment.

Secondly, Paul is praying for love, with the idea that faith and love are connected (Galatians 5:6; 1 Thessalonians 1:3; 2 Thessalonians 1:3, Philemon 1:5; 1 Peter 1:21-23; 1 John 3:23). The problem is that we protect ourselves from getting hurt in love because of our own insecurities or self-love which real faith will ultimately help us overcome. If we lack love, we lack faith.

Finally, Paul prays for hope which is why we do the first two. A biblical hope is a looking forward to heaven which, through justification, is secured, airtight (Titus 3:5-7). This hope is not dependent on our works and it's not of this world. It's a culmination of faith.

Christ as Central in World Transformation (Mark 15:16; Revelation 5:9; Colossians 3:11)
Fortunately for us, God is already doing this, without our help, through the Gospel, which, as Josh points out, was a word that early Christians latched onto, because it meant "to proclaim." I don't really get the connection a week later, but I'm sure it was awesome Josh! Anyway, the proclamation of the Gospel is not contingent upon us sharing it, but it is our privelege to participate in that proclamation. Paul then gave the example of his friend Epaphrus and his faithfullness to God and how he can use even common ordinary people to share his uncommon glorious Word.

Closing
The practical application for us from these two different transformations is that we must bleed the Gospel by reminding ourselves of our own sin through confession (whether at night before bed, or in the morning upon waking up), the power of the Gospel in our lives (importance of the Cross), by looking for people to forgive (never ceasing and doing it quickly), thinking about what Christ died for (us), and thinking about God's unstoppable plan of salvation.

Colossians 1:1-2 - 3.4.07

2007-03-12T14:53:00.000-07:00

Ok, so some of you who read this will be thinking, "Is Rob trying to become a hairy Challies?" The short answer is no. The long answer is, I admire Tim's work and can't deny that he has had an influence on my own blogging, but I'm still not trying to one-up him. That being said, I am going to begin attempting to do what I'll call post-liveblog the sermons at our church, Auburn Sovereign Grace Fellowship. It may be tougher than I think, but I'm still going to attempt it and give it a trial run. So here goes.

I know this is a week late, but this sermon was given by our pastor Josh Winans last Sunday March 4, 2007 as an overview of the book of Colossians. I took notes as I did for the first liveblog of Shepherd's, so basically, very generic outline form, and pretty poor to say the least. I'll try and keep it in as much of a dialogue as possible though, and remember, I'm recalling this from a week ago so parts may be embellished when they shouldn't and the focus may not always be on the right thing. Your grace is requested!

Intro
Josh started the night with a compelling story of the Levi jeans. Apparently, when Levi's were invented they had copper rivets, like today, except in the crotch as well to hold the jean together since they probably didn't have the greatest stitches just yet. Anyway, when ranchers/cowboys/anyone who camped, squatted by the fire, they got what I think he referred to as "fire-crotch," where that copper crotch rivet got hot, and most cowboys didn't wear boxers/briefs/boxer-briefs, so needless to say they got burned in or on or near their unit. The point of the story was, that eventually Mr. Levi went camping, had this happen to him, and ultimately eliminated (or "changed") the copper rivet once he found it necessary. The same is true of our lives. Once we realize that change is necessary, we need to make it so, basically putting Christ at the center.

The Incomparable Christ
Paul in his letter to the Colossians written around 60 a.d., made it clear in the first 17 verses that Christ is the thing that holds everything together, from worship to prayer, from the church to creation (1:15-17). Christ will also reconcile all enemies to Himself, including us, and only by his blood (1:21-22). It is because of these two things, and more, that Christ continues to amaze (1:6, 10; 2:2, 7). This is both the essence of who he is, who we are as a body (1:25-27), and who we are as an individual believer in Christ.

There's an old story of a man who had a radio in the early 20th century, tuned it to the Grand Ole Opry, and tore off the dials to never have the channel changed because that was all he ever needed to listen to. The same is true of us. We need to tear off all the excess and just be left with Christ. Funny how the week after I heard this, my favorite talk of Shepherd's was Al Mohler describing this exact thing.

The Christ Effects (results of knowing Christ)
Because we have the ability to have an intimate relationship with Christ, we are able to accomplish all things necessary for holiness. The first Josh pointed out was the ability to dodge error (2:16-17, 21-23). Just as bank tellers are trained by handling money for hours and hours in order to be able to spot counterfeits, so we should be handling Christ over and over in his word to spot inerrancies.

We also are able to live carefully by, what Josh calls from, getting Christ (3:1-4, Hebrews 5:14), getting dressed (3:5-16), getting along with one another (3:17-4:1), and getting the word out (4:2-18).

Closing
The crux of this book is obviously Christ, and Josh ended with a great quote from Spurgeon,

"The doctrine of the death of Christ for our sins should inspire us with greater
love for the Lord Jesus. Can you look at his dear wounds and not be wounded with
love for him? Are not his wounds as mouths which plead with you to yield him all
your hearts? Can you gaze upon his face beguiled with bloody sweat and then go
away and be ensnared with the world's painted beauties? Oh for the vision of the
crucified! When shall we see the face that was so marred for us? When shall we
behold the hands and feet which bare the nailed mark still and look into the
wounded side bejeweled with the spear wound? Oh when shall we leave all our
sins and grieves forever to behold him shine and see him still before us? Oh
when shall we be far from a world of grief and sin with God eternally shut in?
Our hope, our solice, our glory, our victory, our all found in the blood of the
Lamb in whom be glory forever and ever!"

Ultimately, from this book we'll know who he is, how great he is, and why we should show Christ in every part of our lives.

Reflections on a father...

2007-03-12T12:39:00.000-07:00

Last Sunday a little girl named Logan Waldeck died of aplastic anemia. Although I never knew her or her family, it wrenched my heart to hear about such a young life ending so soon. Her father's strength at her memorial service in his faithful preching of the gospel to those who gathered, from hospital staff, to neighbors, was extremely encouraging. I just went to their family's website for Logan, which contained a journal entry the day she died and one the day after the memorial service. I knew last week, the day after it happened, that John Piper's Dad William Piper had gone to meet our heavenly Father. For some reason I waited to read his journal entry, which you can read here, he so humbly posted until today, almost a week later.

Often times I will be watching TV, a movie, or listen to someone speak on some topic, usually the loss or love of family, and sadly, even fewer times am I moved to tears over what Christ did for me on the cross. I can't recall ever having cried over reading something, until today, twice.

The way in which the Waldeck's kept Christ at the center of their grief and loss and were able to lean on their faith in Him for faith was awe-inspiring. Never before had I heard of a family who so avidly believed in the soveriegnty to God that it allowed them to lift up thier little girl in prayer and honestly trust that it was all part of God's plan. Please read their story and share it with others who may be going through the same grief.

The passion John had for his father and gratitude at the witness he had both to him and thousands of others for Christ, was sincerely moving. The way in which he whispered scripture into his father's ear as he was passing away was amazing.

My prayer, is that we all are that grateful for our father's, and find the things they've done in their lives that have brought us closer to Christ.

final shepherd's thoughts

2007-03-10T22:15:00.000-08:00

Well, I've been home for almost 12 hours now. After the final session last night, our group skipped out on the soap box session, and went back to our hotel for some jacuzzi time. Turns out that was the idea of another group, some Candian air workers. It was a good opportunity to meet some unbelievers, and a couple of our guys took advantage of that and attempted to throw the gospel out there. Hopefully some good seeds were planted. After the pool area closed, we headed over to our nightly hangout at a Mexican restaurant for some more fellowship, where our buddy Adam Davidson was able to join us. Personally, I was really encouraged by the conversation, (after some friendly flowing!), about what we should do as men of the church when we got back. I'm looking forward to how that all plays out in the near future.

Now, as far as the conference was concerned...I feel extremely blessed to have been able to not only attend, but have the gracious folks of Shepherd's give me a scholarship to participate. This was an experience under solid teaching that I could never replace and praise God for. The highlight of the speakers was definitely Al Mohler's talk on preaching Christ and Him crucified. It was interesting talking about highlights with the other guys and how almost everyone had a unique highlight, proving to me the value of expository preaching in the personal conviction by the Holy Spirit through each godly man.

The options for seminars was pretty good, but I was definitely bummed that I missed Wednesday as there were some that I really wanted to attend. Fortunately, Shepherd's is offering mp3's of those missed seminars for only $1! Yet another reason to go!

As a closing thought, the way in which the organizers of Shepherd's poured their hearts, time, and resources into this conference was a blessing to witness and be a part of. Thank you to all who volunteered their efforts. It was not unnoticed.

Grace and peace

Friday evening, general session 8, John MacArthur

2007-03-10T00:42:00.000-08:00

Dr. John MacArthur – Pastor of Grace Community Church, Sun Valley, CA

John has been under a lot of scrutiny and criticism for his opening talk this weekend, which is unfortunate, because I think a lot of guys have missed his brilliant teachings. In any event, he blessed us with his knowledge this evening. He preached from Luke 18:9-14, pointing out that some feel that the doctrine of justification came from Paul, when obviously after reading this passage, Jesus discussed it here.

The question being posed here was how does one become righteous, or justified? The Jews felt that it was through ones own religious and moral efforts. When Jesus points out that the taxpayer was declared justified, the Jews listening were stunned. This tax collector felt he couldn’t be justified in and of himself, but needed “divine accomplishment.”

Jesus’ audience in this parable is found in verse 9, those who trusted in themselves, or the Pharisees, pointed out in Luke 16:14, and surely the same group listening then. The benchmark of these Pharisees was self-confidence, achieved by their own works, which is true of any other religion or cult that is not Christianity. The ultimate example of this is found in Philippians 3:4 and on where Paul talks about his great accomplishments as one of those Pharisees. The ultimate attempt at personal justification was Martin Luther, trying to seek forgiveness for the minutest of sins, finding it impossible.

Jesus’ analogy is a bit simpler. Two men went to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and one a taxpayer, bogged down, more likely than not, bogged down by crowds, and take part in the ritualistic festivities of the butcher like Pharisees. They would be on opposite ends of the temple grounds. The Pharisee prays in such a way that the prayer can’t really even be considered a prayer, but as John described it “Ahb-noxious.” First he said what he was not, then he tells them what he is. He fasted twice a week when according to Leviticus there’s only one time a year to fast, during the feast of atonement, and yet the Pharisees fasted Monday and Thursday, market days, (you gotta have a crowd if you’re gonna fast!), so it was all for show. The tax gatherer however, was the lowest of the low, the humblest of the humble, for he was regarded as nothing to the Jews. His location in the temple, way in the back, displayed his status within the Jewish community Even his posture showed his humility by not even being able to draw his eyes to heaven. Finally, the actions he showed was profound agony over sin, because normally, only middle eastern women beat their breast when a child died, not men. For a middle eastern man to do this represented the decrepit and reliant state that he was in. He was submissive, meritless, he wanted forgiveness, he was a model of confession, his faith is assumed, and seeks only God. Mac then goes into the Greek of the word “merciful” which would be better translated as “be propitious to me,” essentially for God to apply the work of substitutionary atonement, bringing us back to the centrality of the gospel and our need for the same propitiation. This was a ridiculous request for this man to say these things and request such action until he was made clean.

Jesus’ action as a result of these men was condemnation for the Pharisee and justification for the taxpayer. This would have been appaling to the Pharisees, the hearers of this story, because there was no merit, works, or actions by the tax collector to change his life. However, Jesus’ atonement would have been worthless to those who sought it by their own abilities. In the end, the damned think they’re good and the exalted think they’re evil, and other comparisons that he spoke too fast for me to write!

Overall, fairly good talk. Some of our guys enjoyed it more than I did. Maybe though that's because MacArthur covers so much so fast it's hard to really take notes! I gotta drive home tonight so I'll try and post some final thoughts tomorrow sometime.

in between sessions

2007-03-09T19:38:00.001-08:00

So I did today what some might call blasphemous, in that I skipped out on some of the sessions today, the 10:45 seminar as well as the 2:00 Q&A with the keynote panel. For the 10:45 I went and visited my good friend Matt, his wife Sarah, and their almost 1 year-old son Seth. It was a much needed reprieve, one that I took a lot of grief for since I didn’t double check the time the seminar ended, which on my nametag said 12:30, but apparently in the book it said 12:00. So, needless to say, right as I left I got a phone call from my ASGF buddies asking where the crap I was!? After punishing me by having me drive all the way back out to Sun Valley, only to then make me drive the 25 minutes to Valencia by myself, we made up over pizza, sandwiches and calzones at this great Italian dive. We then had the privilege of going to this sick mini golf course called The Greens. At first I was really skeptical since it cost $14 a piece, but once we started playing on the real grass, real sand (where I spent most of my time), and the cliff/waterfall holes, I was convinced that it is indeed the greatest mini-golf course in the world! For dinner, Stone Fire Grill, a shameless, but tasty, knockoff of Firestone Grill in SLO.

Tonight, after the final general session, Shepherd’s is doing something new and having each of the keynote speakers stand on their “soapboxes” and discuss whatever’s burning in their heart, which should be awesome, unfortunately, the guys decided to skip it. I think some of them are still a bit peeved about the premil vs. aumil arguments that are going on under the surface within the general sessions. In any event, I’ll post one more liveblog for the conference during MacArthur’s final talk of the week, but I’ll try and put up my final thoughts tonight before I go to bed.

Friday morning, general session 7, Mark Dever

2007-03-09T09:28:00.000-08:00

9:00 am General Session 7
Mark Dever –

This morning Mark got up to speak to us and started by commending the people at Shepherd’s for their willingness to extend their own knowledge of conferences toward the 9 Marks ministry. A friendly hand extended since the infamous “premillenial/dispensationalist” talk Wednesday morning. Good to see the love shown to Johnny Mac.

Dever began his actual talk by talking about the intolerance shown both abroad and at home towards Christians. What should we do because of this? He points us to Daniel.

Daniel’s stories are often misunderstood. Faithfulness guarantees survival. A “how-to” guide. A religious, succeeding guide. No. And so he explained what it really is about, these first 6 chapters. Daniel is both outstandingly faithful, and a model of prosperity. Quite a combination.

The true nature of the book came to light when Dever pointed out that it may seem like Judah’s God was defeated, but 1:2 points out that it was God who delivered them into Nebuchadnezzar’s hand, and was in control of the entire exile and captivity. Even Daniel’s interpretation of dreams were interpreted correctly because of the power of God. It is because of God granting proper interpretation, Nebuchadnezzar made Daniel overseer of Babylon, going from death sentence to ruler. The point is to look at Daniel as more of an example of what God does with those who are faithful. God causes the faithful to survive.

He then moved on to outline three counterpoints to myths Daniel exposed:

1. God is our only hope. We are not hopeless, He is sovereign over all the world, and His kind faithfulness is what gives Daniel prosperity, not Daniel’s faithfulness. In chapter 3, Nebuchadnezzar asks what God would be able to rescue anyone from his hand, and of course the answer is God! This rhetorical question brings about an answer unexpected from the asker. Ultimately, Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego escape from the blazing furnace because of the Lord’

Interestingly enough, Mark used Nebuchadnezzar’s pride and the humility revealed at the end of chapter 4, to go into a gospel discourse. He addressed those among us who might be visiting with other pastors or friends and laid out the good news to reach out to those who may not know Him. To me, this really displayed where Mark’s heart is at, centered around the cross, constantly reaching out to the lost, unabashedly preaching the gospel even, heaven forbid, at a pastor’s conference! What’s great is that even if none are saved because of this discourse, we all needed to hear it again, and not get caught up in our own ministries, purposes, programs, but to keep centered on the cross. While the whole message may very well not have been, as, according to Mohler, the winepress distills all the waste away, centered around the cross, by throwing the cross into the center of his message, for this listener it sure was what was left after the pressing.

2. You can survive. Just because it seems that all is lost, doesn’t mean all is lost! In chapter 5, after nearly 70 years and serving 2 kings, Daniel still is going strong, considered third ruler, an exile second only to the emperor of the Babylonian empire. We will survive only with trust in Christ as Daniel had.

3. You will face opposition. The myth is, that the world is moral, and the world is so fallen that the godly face the opposition. Dever than said that we could check out at this point, because he was going to pound just that idea for the last 15 minutes. We have never saved 3 kings, and yet Daniel did and still faced opposition. In chapter 6, there were unprincipled men around to thwart Daniel’s prosperity, as he rose once again toward the top. This example is that we are in a fallen world, and no matter the situation, we can’t expect a utopia, “righteousness is no guarantee to avoiding trials.” During this point, Dever got quite excited toward the notion that we need to be preaching tough times to our congregations, and made the comment at the end of his emotional discourse, “obviously that wasn’t in the notes!” The rest of the book, in paraphrase, refers to the tribulation that we’ll face as God’s chosen people. Trials aren’t something we can avoid, as “if by our own effort we can somehow divert the fall of the human race.” Ultimately, having God, is worth all of the trials that we could ever endure, worth all the pain we could ever experience, even with the totality of heartache in our congregations.

To bring it all together, Dever spoke on the hate speech legislation that may come about in the near future that has happened in Canada, Australia, and such, that has imprisoned pastors. So, while we have hope, and can’t expect prosperity, let’s prepare for prison now, by growing in our love for Christ.

He finished with a short biography of J. Smith, a Christian American who lives in London, and regularly gets up on a soapbox on Hyde Park corner, who says he knows one day he’ll die for what he does, and his wife knows she won’t always be a pastor’s wife, but one day soon, she’ll be a pastor’s widow. So why do we expect to continue to enjoy the prosperity of a painless, persecution-free life here in America? Let us learn from men like J, how to endure for the sake of the cross of Christ and count all things loss as the apostle Paul preached to the Philippians. Amen Mark, thanks for the edifying reality check.

First day reflections

2007-03-08T23:55:00.000-08:00

So before I hit the sack and try and get 7 hours of shut eye, I thought I'd reflect on my first day, although the second of the actual conference, at Shepherd's.

First things first. This conference, is AWESOME! I've never been so moved to "almost" tears from believers in unison singing the praises of the Lord Jesus Christ. The first time we men broke out in song was indescribable. Honestly, you had to be there to truly know what I'm writing about, so maybe next year for you!

As far as the speakers, I've noticied something about all of them. They're smart, and I'm dumb. Regardless, I'm still learning a ton about ministry, theology, philosophy, etc. I never knew I could grow in knowledge so quickly.

One critique though, I did feel guilty that my wife Katy couldn't partake of the festivities. She is definitely more of a visual learner and so to listen to the sermons on mp3 would be futile. Hopefully, they'll move the conference to a convention center to allow women to come to the general sessions again and provide a pastor's wives section as well.

All the books blow my mind. I can't believe how much they drop the prices for us here, and how much free literature we get!

Last thought before turning in...it has been awesome being with the guys from my church, however, at the same time, all my buddies that are here from SLO graciously want to hang out as well, so I'm finding it tough to split my time with them all and not miss out on anything. Tough problem to have I know...too many friends. Well, I love them all and appreciate their willingness to be a part of my life.

Anyway, great first day, I'm sure the second will be even better!

Thursday evening, general session 6, Dr. Al Mohler

2007-03-08T19:31:00.000-08:00

Dr. Al Mohler – President of The Southern Baptist Theologically Seminary

Tonight we had the privilege of hearing the godly voices of The Master’s College chorale for a good half hour, a chorale that has sung and will sing in Carnegie Hall. MacArthur then told a story of a young Arabian girl who enduring unfathomable persecution once going home, and her encouraging quote when she was being beaten to death by her uncle, she replied of her feelings that her uncle “believed in a religion he was willing to kill for, while I believe in a Savior I’m willing to die for.” Then, the infamous Al Mohler got up to preach.

The way in which Dr. Mohler began brought a smile to my face, with his recounting of the prior speakers, and his own humility in light of CJ Mahaney’s message the night before with stories of sprawling, getting lost in another church, and even within his own marriage. What a relief to hear a prestigious president of a seminary interject the seriousness of preaching with lighthearted stories before an anticipated discourse.

According to Dr. Mohler, we encounter too many “greeting card” theology preachers, who offer you “Your Best Life Now.” He then transitioned into 1 Corinthians 2:1-5, “1And when I came to you, brethren, I did not come with superiority of speech or of wisdom, proclaiming to you the testimony of God. 2For I determined to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ, and Him crucified. 3I was with you in weakness and in fear and in much trembling, 4and my message and my preaching were not in persuasive words of wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power, 5so that your faith would not rest on the wisdom of men, but on the power of God.” Which is no “greeting card” theology, but is a theology nailed to the cross. Paul’s point in this passage is to glorify the cross, the gospel.

So, he says, to what extent do we preach the cross? The cross makes no sense if you’re looking for therapy or self-help. The only way the cross makes sense is if you understand that Christ did for us what we could not do ourselves, and it will always be counter-cultural.

The first issue Paul takes up is “superiority of speech or wisdom.” Essentially he didn’t try and gain their attention with his rhetorical ability. He means to persuade without playing any games of the culture of Corinth’s oratory emphasis. Mohler then gave a brief description of various influences of rhetoric, from the Sophists to Plato to Aristotle. The three types of rhetoric of Aristotle are described as well, ethos (credibility), pathos(evangelical preaching), and logos (logic/expository preaching), displaying Mohler’s understanding of historical speech and the importance placed on it in various cultures. He then went into the biblical view of rhetoric according to Paul, that these forms of speech weren’t to hard for him, but that he refused to speak with anything but Jesus Christ and Him crucified.

Nowadays, we don’t worry about fancy orators, Sophists, or slick preachers coming to town and stealing away the congregations, we worry about advertising, sound bytes, the 10 second plug. It’s at this point that Mohler gave an account of the soap motto man, who used slick words that seduced like the slogan for Ivory soap, “the new and improved.” Politicians play this same game today.

Even in Paul’s day he became worried about these same things we’re bombarded with today, the ethos, 2 Corinthians 11. For example, if all our sermons were put into a gigantic wine press, what would they dwindle down to? Scary to think about. Would it be the whole gospel? Would it be 2 Corinthians 5:21? Ephesians 2:1-10? Philippians 2:5-11? Mohler gave quite a handful of verses that summarize the gospel message, leaving many us staggered and convicted from this news.

When you preach the theology of the cross it doesn’t make the preacher look wise, it makes God look glorious. Simple, clear, unhindered preaching of the cross was the point of Paul. The only persuasion that matters is the persuasion of the Holy Spirit. He never sold the gospel short.

It’s not to say, Mohler pointed out, that God doesn’t call eloquent men to preach, they just need to be careful, because too many congregations are listening for eloquent speech, and they don’t realize that they’re missing the cross of Christ.

Paul’s second concern in this passage is weakness. Purposeful weakness in himself, and the strength of the cross magnified. We should remember when we preach that we are “dying men, preaching to dying men,” so says Richard Baxter. These inabilities are weakness personified, and show the necessity in our own lives of the cross of Christ. Paul didn’t arrive in Corinth tanned and ready, he arrived weak and trembling.

It doesn’t seem that the cross is directly denied from the pulpit, it’s just not specified, defined. Let us preach as ones that have been regenerated by the Holy Spirit and are eager to display the power obtained through the cross.

Mohler describes David Miller (?), one who has a disease similar to MS, but more severe, who goes around the country preaching in a wheelchair, memorizing his texts since he can’t even hold his can between his knees, let alone his sermon notes, and how when he preaches, it’s obvious who his strength is, by his words and those who are convicted of their sin in their lives.

As a preacher of the word, as we all are, pulpit or not, what will you come with? You have to come with something. Will it be words, charisma, eloquence, learning, persuasion? Or the knowledge of the testimony of God? Jesus Christ and Him crucified.

Know that these notes are a mix of my thoughts, Mohler’s quotes, paraphrases from the sermon, and insinuations of a hairyformed.

Thursday afternoon, session 3, Steve Lawson

2007-03-08T16:42:00.001-08:00

3:45 pm Session 3 “On the Shoulder’s of Giants: Snapshots from church history: Calvin”
Steve Lawson – Christ Fellowship Baptist Church, Mobile, AL

Walked in a little late, but Calvin’s achievements academically were amazing. Going to college in Paris at 14! Wrote the institutes at 26! Pastored his first church at 26, ran out of his pulpit in Geneva after only 2 years! Eventually asked backed three times until he accepted. Calvin’s emblem was a hand with a human heart in it, his, being offered up to God. “No man was ever so surrendered to do the will of God as John Calvin.” It was because of Calvin that Geneva became the hub of the Reformation, and where the Geneva Academy started. Men would come there to learn, and go back to their homelands to be martyred. Geneva Bible was translated with study notes added, and the King James Bible came out as a violent reaction to the Geneva Bible.

Calvin’s accomplishments and life are truly amazing. He’s even attributed by one scholar as second only to Paul in the importance to the spreading of the gospel.

Lawson then went on to talk about the importance of the Reformation in regard to preaching. A couple key points were that the pulpit was brought back to the center of the church, with the bible at the center and faith being the key, and biblical, controversial, grace centered preaching was brought to the limelight.

In regard to preaching, Lawson points out 4 steps.

1. Approaching the Pulpit – need biblical authority, a divine presence, the pulpit needs to be a priority, and have sequential exposition
2. Preparing the Preacher – this requires a diligent mind, a devoted heart, and a relentless will. (to be honest at this point, I zoned out for a bit and went over my Reader.)
3. Launching the Sermon – Needs a direct beginning, an extemporaneous delivery, a scriptural context, and a stated theme.
4. Expounding the text - you need a specific text, exegetical precision, a literal interpretation, cross references, persuasive reasoning, and reasonable deductions.

He may have been more detailed in his steps relating to Calvin’s preaching, but my stomach was hurting as well as the rest of my church’s guys, so I went and got the Camry to go to Fuddrucker’s. Grace and peace to you all. This conference is AWESOME!!!

Thursday morning, q & a session, Dr. John MacArthur

2007-03-08T11:14:00.003-08:00

I know these aren't anywhere close to Challies, but still, at the very least good for me to get my notes and maybe reflect later on them and clean them up. In any event, my 2nd session:

Question #1 – Regarding hermeneutics, why is a consistent literal hermeneutic necessary for premillenialism?

If you allow the words to mean what they were supposed to have meant in biblical times, you’d come up with pre-millennialism. Aumillenialism wasn’t prevalent in the OT. There is no mandate anywhere in the OT that you have to change the rules of interpretation for future prophecies. These prophecies were fulfilled quite literally in many cases. The value of the OT to the NT believer is in it’s literal fulfillment.

Question #2 - How would you approach a congregation trapped in years of legalism?

I would not assault their consciences and preach Christian liberty. Usually talking about an approach to the Christian life, not in regards to salvation. The conscience is a mechanism that is informed by our decisions. Rm. 2. You have to re-inform the conscience by moving people off the rules they live by and onto Christ.

Question #3 – Ezk. 44-46 – How does this relate to Christ’s ultimate sacrifice?

It’s uniquely Jewish and uniquely for them? To be honest, I had no idea what exactly was going on, so many phrases and terms were over my head, it blew my mind.

Question #4 - Can you comment on Hebrews 8 in relation to covenant?

Basically, go after eschatology in the same way you would soteriology, and other theology

Question #5 - How do you know if you’re called to full-time ministry? Prepare for it?

If you can do seminary, do it. It’s not necessary for effective ministry. What is necessary is that you master an understanding of the word of God. If you do go, go to a place where you’ll “master” the truths of scripture. Not about how to be “culturally aware” and “blasted with “toxicity.” Can’t get from a biblical view of justification to sanctification being immersed in today’s culture. A call starts with a heart’s desire, if it’s the only thing you want to do and nothing else interest’s you, until you don’t “make sense” anymore. Rests in the hands of the church to affirm.

Question #6 - What practical advice would you give to a pastor starting out in ministry?

God will bless your life with the true preaching of His Word. Don’t measure your ministry by how many people show up. Take heed to your life, your own personal godliness, and your teaching/doctrine.

Question #7 – How would you define your brand of dispensationalism?

He doesn’t believe on superimposing a system on the bible, you have to let the bible speaks. The bible promises a future salvation for the nation of Israel. What God’s doing in the church now is not a cancellation of the OT promises.

Question #8 - What is your sermon preparation process look like?

Read the text, over and over, and in it and under it. Then, he takes a legal pad with a verse/page. Next, looking at the Greek text. Then looking over commentaries, and read at least 20 plus commentaries, wading through for nuggets (my word, not his), taking notes, ideas, thoughts, cross-references. That might all take a day, 6-8 hours?, studying at home to be able to not weigh in on everything else. Wait a day, then write the rough draft, an outline, main point, and main theme. Next, going through an intro, finally a conclusion, and on the way, finding biblical illustrations, that have authority. All written by hand, with no one but him looking at it

Thursday morning, general session, Dr. Ligon Duncan

2007-03-08T09:58:00.000-08:00

Real generic, I know, but here're my notes from the first session I attended. My buddies Drew and Jeff didn't come in till late last night and thus missed MacArthur, Lawson, and Mahaney's first session. If I'm lucky, I'll listen to them and blog them later...we'll see. Anyway, here they are. Good luck with interpretation, and I'll try and do better throughout!

Shepherd’s Conference 2007

Wednesday – March 8, 2007
9:00 am session
Dr. Ligon Duncan – Presbyterian pastor in Scotland

Numbers 5 – (preaching through Genesis, Psalm 1, Exodus, Psalm 2, etc.)
- After preaching through Hebrews, then going through Leviticus, new appreciation for Hebrews
- 36 chpts. 1288 vs.
- book of History, and we hate history, Ford taught us that “history is bunk”
- references Ronald Regan telling stories, drawing you in, just like Moses does here
- Duncan taught history in the south from his father taking him through graveyards and saying “son…these are your people.”
- Our lives are about dealing with people behaving badly, and what better book to go through than Numbers
- Filled with stories, and arbitrary sections of laws and procedures
- Moses, not just a great story teller, but a great organizer, everything relates
- 1 Corinthians 10:1-13 – everything talked about, happened in the wilderness, tells us that it was written for us and even happened for us to learn from and adjust our living, especially v.6, v.11
1. Events that occurred in the wilderness were examples, combats cultural standpoint of only redemptive historical preaching w/o application. Problem is NT has OT examples, encouraging and exhorting Christians
2. He tells us that these events were done to prescribe a “moral warning.” Keep us away from evil cravings
3. They happened, not just recorded, but actually happened for us to give an example to us. Stresses those dying in the wilderness for us.
4. Provide exhortations to NT believers in v. 7
5. Applies it to them in 4 areas: 1. Don’t be idolaters (bible written as full scale assault on idolatry), if we’re going to be disciples, not just decisions on the pew 2. Not to be immoral, (specifically sexually) 3. Not to presumptuously test the Lord 4. Not to grumble, v. 7-10,
6. Written down for Christians
7. Warns us against thinking that we won’t fall like they did
8. We’re to learn from their temptations and failures in order to escape ours, v. 13.
9. The whole wilderness thing, who’s in the middle? Christ. The rock that followed them.
- Duncan points to hymn, “Guide Me, O Thou Great Jehovah” – William Williams, written about Numbers
- Broken into 3 parts
1. v. 1-4 recount physical impurities that can remove you from camp
2. v. 5-10 moral offenses that can remove you from camp
- in v. 1-10, obvious physical reasons to separate them from camp, as well as theological reasons, that He is holy and is present, and thus requirements if we are to dwell near Him.
3. v. 11-31 domestic tensions from marital infidelity or fear of it
- long reading
- This passage points out 5 things:
1. Larger theological significance of this ritual (big picture)
a. Other ancient cultures had trials of ordeal to prove an improvable crime. Assumed guilty until proven innocent, with cruel tests (put hand in boiling water or on red hot rod with no scathing to prove innocent)
b. In this case, the word of God’s judgment will find her out. In contrast, this test is physically safe (unpleasant to drink dust), it’s controlled and public.
c. This is God’s version of a trial of ordeal. This text is here to show that adultery defiles the camp.
2. The importance of sexual purity to the whole of the people of God
a. This is a spiritual issue, and a people of God issue. It’s a test of faithfulness to God. Why just a law for a jealous issue only for husbands? 1. I don’t know! 2. Doesn’t mean that God’s law was chauvinistic, it covers men and women, with both under the penalty of death for infidelity. 3. May be a logic designed to protect a wife who is unjustly suspect of infidelity, to prevent her, as in other cultures, of disappearing. If this doesn’t convince the husband she’s innocent, nothing will!
3. Teaches about the importance of the ordinances of God (pictured oath)
a. She has to take into her body, holy things, and is a reminder of the laws of God? v. 17. Slaughtered animals represent the broken oath of the people.
4. Teaches us about the importance of the marriage bond and how that relates to us as a people of God (sacredness of marriage)
a. Marriage is a picture of grace attained between God and His people. What is at stake in your own marriage? The gospel is at stake. There’s no place for people who are immoral in their marriages within the people of God.
5. Teaches us about the work of Christ on the Cross (atoning work of Christ)
a. Drinking of these curses, reminds us of Christ drinking curses. v. 23-24. References Luke 5 and Jesus touching the leper and how Jesus doesn’t become unclean, the leper becomes clean, and then the woman hemhorraging becomes clean, and finally the dead child become clean (alive).
b. Jesus drank that proverbial cup for us, and drank it to the dregs.

first attempt at liveblogging

2007-03-08T09:44:00.000-08:00

Hey everyone, I'll be attempting to live blog Shepherd's Conference at Grace Community Church in Sun Valley, CA this weekend. Wish me luck, and heads up for the plethora of blogs coming your way!

mars hill in "top churches" based on "top lists"

2007-03-05T13:28:00.000-08:00

Through my reader today I came across this post from churchrelevance on the top 22 churches in America. Basically they combined a bunch of different lists and came up with their own top 22 based on a church's average ranking in those lists.

Let me point this out from that list. Driscoll's church Mars Hill in Seattle was #16, and out of those top 22, his had the LOWEST attendance. What an impact the truth can make.

Granted, I can't necessarily consider the original source of the lists as credible, since to me Covenant Life, Grace Community, and Bethlehem Baptist Church to name a few, are left off of the list.

Anyway, interesting nonetheless.

don't read if you're not caught up on your Tivo

2007-03-01T12:47:00.000-08:00

Ok, so I was checking my reader today, and my daily dose of Vitamin Z reminded me of Lost last night.

SPOILER COMING...

Let me be frank. It sucked. I was so bored while watching it that I was actually able to do some work. Usually, I'm so captivated by the drama, the back stories, and the plot that I can't even function and my beagle Lucy will poop on the floor from neglect. Not so last night. It seemed promising at first with Cheech Marin as Hugo's father, but that was short lived. The whole episode seemed to be a pity party for Hugo and his "bad lottery luck." Highly disappointed.

Fortunately, the last few minutes with the disclosure of the French woman's daughter as still being alive and, in the Heroes' Claire fashion, Ben, the leader of the others, seeming to have abducted his daughter, made it partially worth it.

Anyway, I won't give up on it like Z did, but the writer's definitely need to redeem themselves next week.

best tie in the world

2007-02-22T11:27:00.000-08:00

It brought a smile to my face...not often done with a tie:

copyright of unashamed workman's blog

Way to go Dr. Piper, even when you aren't praying, you're still praying with your tie.

this guy has it right

2007-02-21T14:29:00.000-08:00

Zach Nielsen has a blog called "Vitamin Z" that is geared a lot like how I want this blog to be, deep and shallow. He recently posted a quick blog on his favorite shows and it's dead on. He definitely has his priorities right, simplified tv solutions, except 24 needs to be at the top, and American Idol could be switched for Heroes/Prison Break. But VZ still hit on some key shows nonetheless.

I still struggle like I previously wrote on how much media to take in, fortunately guys like VZ stroke that part of my conscience allowing me another week of guilt free watching, until Harris writes again!

letter to the critics

2007-02-21T14:03:00.000-08:00

As promised, I did send a letter to the author in question from my previous blog, the critique of fellow believers. Here is that correspondence in full, with the author's name asterisked, in sequential order:

Email 1 ~

***** -
I said to my "1" reader that I would email you my thoughts I posted on my blog and not just leave it in the blogosphere. Hope you get chance:

http://hairyformed.blogspot.com/2007/02/critique-of-fellow-believers.html

In His love,
Rob Grindy

Response 1 ~

Dear Rob:
Thank you for your article. I'm not certain what to think about it-- One brief thought: do you believe those men mentioned lately in the blogosphere who have been "hit hard" deserved to be mentioned because of their unsound doctrine or alliances? If so, then how would you deal with it? Speaking the truth in love in part means confronting error head on and pulling no punches (cp, Matt. 23; Jude, 2 Peter, 2 Tim. 2:15-22; 1 Tim. 1:19ff, etc.) Would you say John the Baptist was unloving when he called the Pharisees "brood vipers"?

Let me know your thoughts,
*****

Email 2 ~

Dear ***** -
Thank you for your prompt reply. I guess a more clear way of saying it would be that I don't think they deserve to be pointed out directly as in error or sin unless they have been confronted directly through email, a phone call, etc., as opposed to indirect means through blogging. It seems, but you probably know better than I, that John the Baptist called them a "brood of vipers" to their face, and not just to a crowd of people who would know the pharisees and ultimately word would get back to them. I do agree that unsound doctrine needs to be addressed, just addressed to the person instead of at them, if that makes sense. Thanks again for taking time out of your day to answer my email. Sorry for what may have appeared to have been an ambiguousness in my blog.

For His glory,
Rob Grindy

Response 2 ~

John the Baptist did confront them personally. But the other passages of Scripture dealt with the general idea of unsound doctrine; as well as mentioned names to all in those regions with no indication that he had met with them personally. The issue is not verifying the unsound teaching of these men, but alerting the body of Christ to the error. If there was uncertainty of the error, then I always go directly to the person in question. Otherwise, there is no need unless it is to work with them in conjunction with others to work towards repentance.I appreciate you and thank you for your words.

Grace and peace,
*****

Email 3 ~

Thanks for your input and openness *****. I appreciate your knowledge of scripture and constant reference to the Word. It's both encouraging and satisfying!
For His glory,
Rob

That's the end of the correspondence. Let me know what you all think in response to the blogger's emails/thoughts.

the critique of fellow believers

2007-02-16T12:22:00.000-08:00

Let me first off say, that I know it will sound a bit hypocritical since I am criticizing fellow believers myself, and I don't want to say the end justifies the means, but I will anyway, and again, it's just a sinful man's opinion right?

Believe you me, I am the first to say, don't just agree to disagree, 1 Corinthians 1:10, and in no way shape or form am I saying this here. What I am saying, (I know, finally, how come Rob never gets right to the point of his stories??? Ok, I'll start now) is that why do we as reformed believers, find the need to crack into anyone who does disagree with us? I once read a quote from Bob Russell, who, mind you, I do disagree with in practice and doctrine, that said, "Truth without love is dogmatism. Love without truth is sentimentality. Speaking the truth in love is Christianity." While I might have used a tougher word in place of sentimentality, the crux rings true nonetheless.

If we as full believers in the power of grace, cannot find grace within ourselves to share with those in whom grace only plays a partial role, we need to fix our own walks with Jesus.

The reason I'm saying all this in the first place, is the bitter taste that has and is being left in my mouth from any and all of the recent topics: Mark Driscoll, pastor of Mars Hill Church in Seattle, WA; Francis Chan's video Just Stop and Think; the recent C3 leadership conference in Dallas with such reformers as Ed Young and Driscoll. All of these men have been hit hard as of late, by other reformed men on the God blogosphere, and if asked, "where?" a simple Google search will answer that question.

My beef then lies in the fact that it doesn't appear that any of the bloggers have addressed their concerns with the afore mentioned men's life decisions directly to them, and if they have, they certainly haven't mentioned it in their afore said blogs. Really, I just like the word 'afore.'

Veering onto what appears to be an off topic story, but really isn't, so be 'afore'warned.

What I would consider my second ministry job was at a church in northern California that would probably not make any official "Calvinistic" doctrinal statements. My wife and I decided, knowing full well where they stood doctrinally, to give it a shot, and maybe even reform some folks along the way. Within two months of arriving there, and within only two months of being married, we joined a young married's bible study led by a couple in the church. It turned out to be lead entirely by the wife, with the husband only giving the occasional witty comment. We quickly realized that this type of leadership displayed was contrary to the beliefs we had about roles and such, and informed our pastor we would no longer be attending the group and here's why. Eventually, we had to inform the couple and basically tell them we thought the way they were teaching the study was unbiblical and unsound. The way in which they responded was unbelieveable. They welcomed our comments with open arms, embraced us as friends, and continually showed love and kindness even in the face of disagreement. Granted, they still didn't submit to what scripture says on the subject, but the love that was displayed blew our minds. Although my tenure at that church was tough at times in the face of doctrine I believe to be unsound, the greatest thing I learned there was how to love. Now, don't get me wrong, I don't know, nor probably ever, will agree to disagree, but I will disagree with love in my heart for those who don't see it the way God has allowed me to.

All that to say, do I think it's wrong to confront others when we feel they are in doctrinal error? No. But I do think it needs to be done with a heart and words of love. So do I think that stating one's opinion on the blog about other's error is wrong? Yes. Which is why through the conviction of writing this, I am going to send this blog to the criticizing bloggers who wrote about the afore mentioned men.

Sorry if this blog seems scatter brained. If it does, it's because I was. I got really passionate about it and wrote pretty fast without a ton of reflection, and definitely not as much prayer as should go into anything we write.

"Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ." - Ephesians 4:15

Grace and peace to you.

media mayhem

2007-02-11T02:17:00.000-08:00

For years I've been convicted every time I hear a preacher talk about the subject of media and the time spent immersed in it. I can even remember the time shortly after I was saved reading a book by Joshua Harris entitled I Kissed Dating Goodbye, and being floored by this dream he had called "The Room." Keep in mind, that in no way am I condoning the Josephaic type interpretation of dreams being performed here, but it does have a good point. He starts off in the room that is empty except for one wall that is covered by small index-card files that end up being a catalog for his entire life. As he flips through each file, he finds records of everything he's ever done in his life, from girls he's dated (hence the title) to books he's read to jokes he's laughed at, etc. This passage is what ate me alive:

"When I pulled out the file marked 'Songs I Have Listened To,' I realized that the files grew to contain their contents. The cards were packed tightly, and yet after two or three years, I hadn't found the end of the file. I shut it, shamed, not so much by the quality of music, but more by the vast amount of time I knew that file represented."

He ultimately goes on to say that Jesus comes to this wall-o-cards and read through the whole thing, each card that represented an action in Joshua's life. Jesus then proceeded to take out each card and sign it in his own blood, signifying his death for our life. While it may represent a bit of legalistic thought that I don't think Joshua would agree with now, the concept still breaks me. How could I ignore the fact that Christ died for my sins, and here I sit listening to music that berates and belittles his name?

Now, fast forward ten years to the present and check out this clip of an article from Joshua Harris' blog:

When Paul says "make no provision for the flesh" he’s saying don’t feed your sinful desires. Don’t do things—don’t think things, don’t watch things, don’t meditate on things--that strengthen your sinful inclinations.
Let’s think for a minute about our media diet. I think one of the biggest ways that Christians today feed their flesh is through what we watch on TV, in movies, and online.
We each need to ask the question "Are the things I’m watching feeding my flesh?"
And if the answer is "yes," it doesn’t matter what the movie is rated. It doesn’t matter if everyone you know watches it. You need to act on what God shows you. Don’t feed your flesh. Don’t make provision for your sin. Turn away from it.
• Maybe for you the sensual scenes, or even plots, in certain movies or TV shows increase the strength of lust in your heart. Turn it off.
• Maybe violent movies and shows feed anger and a desire in your soul to use violence to get your way. Turn it off.
• Maybe the advertisements and the values you expose yourself to are feeding your cravings for material things or wrong ideas about your body. Stop watching.
• Maybe the things you watch feed your unbelief and fear. One mother I spoke to recently requested prayer because her dreams were filled with demonic images. She was afraid to sleep. When asked her about her television viewing habits, she told me that she often watched TV shows about real-life crime that were very violent. As we talked, she began to see the connection between what she watched and the bad results in her heart.
Friends, what we view in media becomes our meditation. It either feeds our desire for godliness or it feeds our flesh. Which one are you feeding? If you added up the time you spend reading God’s word, praying, listening to sermons or reading Christian books, how would it stack up against time spent watching TV and movies? If you give more of your time to worldly entertainment and pursuits, is there any reason to be surprised that sinful desires are so strong in your life? No. If we're feeding the flesh, it’s no mystery that we’re not growing in holiness.

Now I realize that conviction of the conscience is a sticky wicket, but for this sinner, man it sucks being calloused. In times like these it literally makes me queasy over how much junk I watch, from American Idol to even LOST, that is un-edifying and "feed[s] my flesh." Am I going to toss my Toshiba in the apartment dumpster? No. What I am going to do is turn it off when things are feeding my flesh. Whatever that is, will depend on the show, scene, actors, wardrobe, etc., but I'm making it my aim to be more aware and focus when I am tubing it.

It's scary sometimes how we can ignore the deepest calling of the Holy Spirit to beat down sin, and yet give in so easily to this flesh that just gets fatter, older, and hairier the more we allow it too. It's times like these that I echo the cry of Paul and say, "O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? I thank God for Jesus Christ my Lord."

blogs v. books v. audio sermons

2007-02-08T14:39:00.000-08:00

Within the last month or so I've been growing addicted to Google reader. For those of you who don't know what it is, basically it brings all of the online articles you want to read, news, sports, blogs, etc., into one accessible page that allows you to see when something new is posted on your favorite sites. So through that, I really got into reading blogs, which I guess I just never knew where good ones were, and for that matter, never bothered really looking. Let me get to the point...

I LOVE BLOGS!!!

Blogs allow me to do what I feel guilty doing with any other form of spiritual media...browse through what interests me and read as much or little about it as I desire. I hate starting things and not finishing them, but with blogs, for some reason it doesn't bother me. So I can get the gist of what the author is trying to say without reading through 200 pages, listening for 45 minutes, or anything else.

Don't get me wrong, there are some very opinionated people out there, with some very skewed outlooks on life, and very un-sound doctrine, but once you cut through the chaff, there are some awesome spiritual nuggets of truth in the blogosphere.

I guess then to keep from rambling too long about what is, at the heart, a blog praising blogs, I can say thanks to my friends Josh & Tim who got me on this joy-train that I now call simply, "The Reader," and give a shout out to our church ASGF and ultimately thank my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ for his amazing grace in allowing me to be privy to such knowledge.

mySpace original blogs

2007-02-08T10:03:00.000-08:00

Ok, so this is the last of all my previous blogs, as no more exist. I did want to transfer all of them to my blogger account though for my own records and for the 3 readers I have out there. These are from my "social networking" phase where I was all amped on mySpace, so please indulge me.

Chrinkin' Dristians - originally posted: 11.22.06

So hopefully the title drew you in enough, and maybe you didn't figure out that it's a little weak anagram meaning drinkin' Christians. Here’s what I do not understand and maybe some could enlighten me. Why are Christians that are on myspace posting pictures of themselves with or without friends, with beers/spirits/wine in their hands? Now I know the first thing many of you are asking is, well rob, don't you drink? Of course. Is there anything wrong with the actual act of drinking? Not biblically. What about getting drunk? Absolutely wrong. Romans 13:13 says that we should "walk properly as in the daytime, not in orgies and drunkenness, not in sexual immorality and sensuality, not in quarreling and jealousy." There's a reason that Paul says, "as in the daytime," because for most of us, we wouldn't dare get wasted before dark, except maybe out of the country/state. It’s embarrassing and nobody wants anyone to think that we might be an alcoholic. Than why is it ok to get drunk at night? Or for that matter at all? It’s pretty clear from scripture, including but not limited to Luke 21:34, Galatians 5:21, and1 Peter 4:3 to name a few.

What’s the justification? Because the world is doing it so it's ok? Because we don't want to be seen as different? Jesus said that "All men will hate you because of me, but he who stands firm to the end will be saved." So shouldn't that nullify any of those justifications?

Here’s my ultimate beef. I don't think that there's anything wrong with having a drink or two with dinner in the privacy of your own home, or even a good distance away from your home, or at other Christian friends' houses that hold to a similar position. My problem lies with those Christians who openly proclaim themselves as such, and drink around people who are either newer Christians, not yet solidified on their own view of drinking and who may stumble when seeing an older, more mature Christian doing so, or even unbelievers. Here’s why. Paul wrote in 1 Corinthians 10:23 that "'All things are lawful,' but not all things are helpful. 'All things are lawful,' but not all things build up" some of you biblical wizards are saying, "well that was specifically toward the church of Corinth at that time and for those people because they were abusing their freedom in Christ." True, but the bible stands for all time, all cultures, and all people. How can we, as mere mortal creations, determine what we can pick and choose to follow from scripture? that said, we become ultimately responsible, not for the actual sin that one may have committed because of our action, but for going against their conscience that maybe has not yet fully developed towards the law of God, or as Paul put it in 1 Corinthians 8:12, "Thus, sinning against your brothers and wounding their conscience when it is weak, you sin against Christ."

Now, I'll step down for a minute from my soap box and say this. I still love all the Christians that drink, get drunk, and do it in public, whatever, in the same way that I still love those who have committed sexual sin. I wish I could say it's because I have agape love like Christ, but the truth of the matter is that I was once in the same sin and could easily fall into it again, hopefully not as easy as the first time, but easy nonetheless. so, while it may seem like I'm condemning Christians that drink, that's not true, I'm merely not condoning it and I do ask that you search the scriptures and your own heart, spend time in prayer with God about it, and figure out what your conscience truly is trying to say to you. If it's not the same as what my conscience is, that's ok, because I wouldn't want to do the exact opposite of that verse above and have this whole blog become one big hypocrisy. That said, thanks for reading this, I love you all and I'll leave you with this: "Though I have much to write to you, I would rather not use paper and ink. Instead I hope to come to you and talk face to face, so that our joy may be complete." - 2 John 12

Siblings as Friends ~ Episode 1 - originally posted: 9.28.06

Ok, so I might lose some of you right away in the title...but give this topic a shot. First, some background.

My brother and I used to be close, and when I mean used to, I mean when we were in elementary school together, i.e. 1990. However, it is important to note that I believed we were close up until 2 months ago. Quite a shock let me assure you. See, I always thought he was a pretty cool guy, fun to hang with, quiet yes, but mysterious quiet, made you want to know what exactly was going on inside. I also realized that because of the close relationship that I saw between my dad and his brother, side-note: my namesake, I wanted that same type of relationship with my brother. No dice. Once we hit puberty, I became reclusive and "too good." Apparently, I may have also left quite a big shadow in my wake. As a result, I saw him being and doing things that I hadn't or wasn't. We started liking different music, getting different grades, going to different colleges, and so on.

I think the big difference was, I remained aloof to our differences and tried to create some false sense of being between us. I honestly and truthfully thought of him as one of my best friends all through college and he was one of my best men, him and my buddy Sam. Reason being, I thought a friend is measured by how much you can confide in them, while enjoying their company. I now have a slightly different interpretation of friendship, namely that you need to enjoy their confidence in you as well. That's the problem with my brother and I ...there is little to no confidence from him in me.

I don't think, strike that, hope, that it's not because he doesn't trust me, but according to him, he always felt like I didn't want to be friends, I wanted to be this "older brother" figure, one he could come to for advice and counsel and I would always give the wisest, truest advice.

How was I supposed to convey that differently? I don't know. It's not like I could just say when I was 16 and he was 14, "Hey bro, just so you know, I want to be friends and brothers, but equal, not with me as the head." That wouldn't have been awkward at all now would it.

I have no idea if this is even chronological, right now I'm just trying to get it all out so I can go to sleep. I'll try and edit it a bit later. Apologies.

So, and let me preface this by saying I've said all this to him already so it's not any surprise, I honestly don't feel like we're friends. Friendship again is a two-way street, both wanting to be friends and confide, and the level of confidence shows the level of friendship. While I would love to tell him everything, now I don't think I can, especially since there's no reciprocation.

Sadly, the worst part is my most important relationship, that with Jesus, is one of the things I always felt like was taboo between us. I guess that should have been my first indication that things weren't all they were cracked up to be in my head.

Again, this is just what's been going on in my head as of late, even tonight. E.g. he had an altercation with my dog the other day, nothing too weird about that, there's definitely no love lost from either side, and then had a conversation with my wife about it that I didn't think was very respectful. I was pretty heated, talked with my dad and mom about it separately, but after that I was calm. I even called and thanked him for how he helped out with the dog, in all sincerity. Somehow it got back to him, via one of my parents, and he addressed it with me. While I appreciated the gesture, it just felt pretty weird, like a forced conversation on both sides.

Maybe that's what needs to happen. We just need to box it out and lay it all on the table. Maybe not though. I don't know. I love him so much, by choice, and sometimes it feels like his love is forced "brotherly have-to" love. It's in God's hands though and I trust His sovereign plan more than anything else....I mean what else can I trust in? People? hahaha...heeheehee...hmmmm. Maybe one day we'll be great friends, but for now, especially with him getting married soon, I'm honestly just trying to stay out of his way and not piss him off while still letting him know I'm there for him if he needs it. Weird situation, not one that's frequented by bloggers I'm sure, but I had to get it all out. There might be more to add later as I organize my thoughts, so I'll entitle this "siblings as friends, episode 1." Thanks for your prayers and for reading the ramblings of a pizza-eating freak.

Pro-whatever - originally posted: 9.24.06

Ok, so here's a little story I have to tell about my one and only run-in with abortion. Some thoughts come from the book above. Katy has this girl she works with at her preschool. Apparently she got pregnant from some guy she barely knows. She's 20 years old, so not too young, but still pretty young to get pregnant. She tells Katy, quite nonchalantly, that she's going to abort the baby. Of course, Katy was appalled and spelled out everything she knew about what was wrong with abortion from the selfishness to the sinfulness, which are pretty much one in the same. So this girl, we'll call her Jill, remained contemplative about the whole thing. Problem is, Katy's work is quite liberal, i.e. some are hippies, nice people, but could be described as tree-huggers, feminists, European (no-shaving anywhere), and as such pushed the pro-choice thing. So this past Tuesday, Katy found out that Jill had an appointment scheduled for Thursday to go get an abortion. That night, we talked it over and wanted to offer to Jill to take the baby. The next day, Katy made the proposal but Jill came up with her 10th excuse and said she didn't even want the baby to come to term because she had been drinking during the first month of the pregnancy and didn't want the baby to come out with any deformities as a result, so she'd rather put it out of its misery now. So, she didn't go to work Thursday or Friday, and just called in sick for Monday. We don't know exactly what went on but aren't very optimistic.

So let me say this. This is my first encounter ever with anyone who's ever even considered an abortion, and I pray it's my last for this reason. I feel like I know a murderer. In fact, to me, I do. In Psalm 139:13 it says, "For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb." We are alive and a soul at the instant of conception, and thus, aborting babies is in fact killing someone. I don't care what your background, beliefs, or culture is, murder is still considered wrong almost since the onset of time. I honestly just feel sick to my stomach, not even knowing how to speak about it, or for that matter, not even wanting to speak about it.

I will say this, the only thing that gives me hope is knowing that the child is in heaven, and the first thing it saw, was Jesus. Pray that the worst, its death, may not be true.

yahoo 360 original blogs

2007-02-06T14:32:00.000-08:00

The following are all blogs I posted when I first got into the blogosphere a year ago. I admit, it's been a sad road ever since in that my consistency is what you would call...lacking. Anyway, read and enjoy.

natural but undisciplined - originally posted: 2.8.06

I've been asked to coach the Inderkum High track team sprinters, which is amusing because I know nothing about the technique of sprinting. I have an agreement with the head coach however, that he'll give me the workout for the day and I'll execute it. It's not a bad gig, I mean I've done all kinds of conditioning in the past both as an athlete and a coach, so I can run drills no problem.

What I've seen during these last two weeks has been the same old thing in every sport in every school I've ever been a part of.

Natural born athletes, no discipline whatsoever.

It doesn't make sense to me and I hope a sports psychologist can explain it to me one day. Why do these kids who are given every single advantage in the world athletically throw it all in the trash by not disciplining themselves and learning mechanics and sharpening their athleticism even more through training??? They walk when they should be running, thinking that they're fast enough to beat anything that comes across their path without a second thought.

Sometimes it's worse. Kids that do practice their butts off and do everything their coaches ask, and yet blow it in the classroom, failing to meet the 2.0 gpa standard and becoming ineligible. It seems that you actually have to try to not get at least C's in high school. I realize that some subjects come easier to some than others, and that some kids have learning disablities, but that can't be the case for every gifted athlete that screws it up academically.In talking to other coaches and teachers the only lame explanation for this can be described merely as:

laziness.

The thing that kills me the most is for athletes like me, the ones who aren't naturally athletic and bust their butt trying to get better, and still falling short of the natural one when they try hard. We're the ones who get the short end of the stick. Always given the "Most Inspirational" or "Coach's Award" or "Most Improved" awards at the end of the season while the "MVP" goes to that naturally talented individual. We're the ones who get the shaft.

Luckily, I married one of those naturally athletic kids. So, if God wills it, our kids will have her athleticism and my work ethic and we'll produce some freakin' awesome athletes! The best of both worlds, contrary to what Candide try to tell us.

On the flip side, our kids could be totally screwed and get Katy's work ethic and my athleticism and end up becoming painters or actors, noble professions, but to me, no excitement.

We'll see...

jitb better than expected - originally posted: 2.6.06

The parking lot at NCVA's Elk Grove facility gets pretty dark at night, what with it's one flickering street light. This lighting did not help. I sat in my Nissan Sentra after throwing my volleyball stuff in the back and tried to put the key into the ignition. Apparently turning it too soon, half of the key broke off and the other half pushed the first part in, jamming the ignition switch and rendering the car useless.

Fortunately I called AAA and they sent out a locksmith with an ETA of an hour. Not wanting to wait in this creepy parking lot, I walked over to the Jack-in-the-Box a block away, the only restaurant within 2 miles. All I wanted to do was sit inside and read my book, problem being that the door was locked. I checked my watch. 9:45. The sign on the front said they closed at 10. So I banged on the door, attracting the attention of 2 ladies working the all-night drive-thru. They mouthed the words "we're closed" and "use the drive-thru" but I persisted. Finally, one of them who spoke broken English came to the door. I explained my situation saying I merely wanted to sit down and read my book while waiting for the locksmith and I wouldn't bother them at all. She called over her manager who was reluctant at first, but ultimately let me in to the mumblings of something to the effect of me working for her if they got fired.

I sat in the JITB for maybe 15 minutes when AAA dispatch called me saying the locksmith had arrived. I told the ladies I appreciated their act of kindness more than they knew but the manager shrugged me off in disdain.

Even though they hesistated in letting me into their store and probably only complied because of my persistance, who knows what travesties they saved me from.

The moral of the story is, don't underestimate the kindness of your local fast food restaurant employees...they just might surprise you.

dogs...man's best friend? - originally posted: 2.1.06

I found quite the disturbing scene when I came home yesterday afternoon, after a long day of Basic Math and Special Ed subbing as well as volleyball weight training. A $35 retractable 12 ft. leash was ripped to shreds all over our living room floor. Also on the ground was my new club volleyball polo I had gotten the night before and my irreplaceable $3 gas station beanie.

I didn't know what to say. I was completely dumbfounded. You see, our puppy Lucy would had to have a vertical leap of at least 46 in. to get on top of the kitchen counter where all of this stuff was sitting. I was speechless. Completely speechless.

What the crap am I supposed to do? Move everything out of the living room so that she can't get to it? We already had to remove the slip covers so she wouldn't eat those. Two couch pillows are destroyed with another one on the way that has to stay in the den while we're gone. We can't put her in a kennel because she'll bark until she passes out. We tried a cage but she starts eating away at the carper. So what's left? Nothing.

I have no idea what to do with my dog that's supposed to be my "best friend" but she keeps destroying my crap!!! Any advice would be appreciated since I'm at the end of my rope

quiet time and artest - originally posted: 1.26.06

Ever since I switched back to working in the secular world, I've found it extremely challenging to stay up on spending quality quiet time with God in His Word every day. It takes extreme commitment to get up at least half an hour earlier each morning so that I have enough time to read my 3-6 chapters of Luke.

I'll be honest...I fail a lot.

Sure, when I was working in ministry, I had the freedom to get up around 10, eat a bowl of Rice Chex and sit on the coach kicked back with my ESV and read 6 chapters like it was nothing. Shoot, sometimes I would even throw in a couple of OT chapters as well.

Now though, the prospect of a comfy bed after only 6 hours of sleep at 7 in the morning seems like the easier option. Granted the fleshly, earthly option, but the easier one.

I admire those people that pop off their pillow and immediately wake up to their alarm without even hitting the snooze once, and can get in plenty of quality time with the Lord. Me...I prefer the 10 hit snooze feature, to the detriment of my wife's beauty sleep (having caused a few fights this past month in the early hours).

Pray for me, because I don't know if this is something that will ever come easy to me. Hopefully once I have kids I'll already be up with them. The problem is, I need to do as Paul said and "discipline my body and bring it into subjection, lest, when I have preached to others, I myself should become disqualified" before I have kids or I don't know if it'll ever happen without direct intervention from the Spirit of God. Anyway, those are my quiet time struggles.

On to Ron Artest.

It's official. Stojakovic for Artest. The gamble of the new century. Seems surreal though, almost like it hasn't really happened until we see Ron in purple. Don't know how this will play out, but I'm definitely optimistic.

Let's be honest. We need defense badly. And I know, I know. One player will not change the entire defensive scheme of a team...but it's a start. I mean we've never had a player with this caliber of defensive mindedness. The closest we've come has probably been Doug Christie, what, 2nd string All-Defense? This guy was the league Defensive MVP for pete's sake.

Throw in a decent mid-range jumper and intensity that can't be disputed, and maybe, just maybe, we'll hit that magic number 8 and see May.

chinese food - originally posted: 1.25.06

Last night Katy and I went to P.F. Chang's in downtown Sacramento for our anniversary dinner. I thought I'd wine and dine her from the get go, but immediately I was thrown off. We agreed not to get each other anything other than a card, so my usual swooning with flowers was out the window. But I made up for it. I had an extra 5 bucks in my pocket that I used to valet park for the first time in my life, which was great because of the fact that I pulled up to the restaurant right at 7 which was the time of our reservation.

Perfect. Valet, reservation, good eats, movie afterward. Or so I thought.

We walk into the restaurant and give the hostess our valet stub for a stamp or something, and say we have a reservation for Rob for 2 at 7. She says ok and that they're clearing off a table for us right not. Sounds good. 20 minutes later we were seated. 10 minutes later we ordered appetizers. Then things actually started to look up.

Chang's spare ribs. Brown and white rice. Honey chicken. Beef with Broccoli. Pork chow mein. Fortune cookies.

It was the first time I had eaten at Chang's and I was impressed with the food, not the service, but the food was great. We ate like we hadn't eaten in days, maybe because it was good, or maybe because it was free with our $50 gift certificate. Either way, it was good eats and regardless of the poor service, we still ate completely free with a 20% tip covered as well.
Here's the thing though. Why is it that no matter what Chinese restaurant I eat at, about an hour and a half later I'm hungry again. It's like the food disintegrates in your stomach, providing no substance whatsoever. I don't think that I'm the only one that happens to. But no matter how much food I stuff down my throat I still end up hungry.

One of the great mysteries of Chinese culture I guess.